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A couple of years down the road, while talking about the sex lives of some of her co-workers, I suspected that she wanted some more variation in her sex life. I suggested we open up our relationship to the possibility of having Lady looking sex Aroda with others. We discussed and fantasized about this for a few weeks, we both were excited about the possibilities.

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Calvin Robinson found this deep concept of grace in Calvin of all people Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 trav- eling toward him wabts a literary path.

Before her graduate work on Shake- speare, she was an undergraduate at Brown majoring in American stud- ies a new discipline Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 the time. She found Laxies the intellectual keenness of New England Calvinist ministers an amazing grace of style.

Looking for its source took her to the French writings of Calvin, whom she sees as an aesthete as well as an enlightened Swiss leader. Arthur Gold- ing, whose translations of Ovid so influenced Spenser and Shakespeare, was an adherent of Calvin and the translator of his sermons and his com- mentaries on the Psalms.

Her salon fostered both the arts and Reformers like Calvin. This approach to Calvin as a Renais- sance humanist Hot woman want sex tonight Gwynedd well as a Reformer is far from our popular conception of him as a gloomy theorist of predesti- nation, with Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 hard division between saints and the unsaved, in a dark world of sins and punishments.

Robinson says that this picture is radically wrong. It neglects his belief in the human mind as Online dating flirting in Naples beautiful miracle that processes all the miracles of nature.

She thinks he I believed in predestination only in the sense that God foresees the future, not that he decrees it. For Calvin, she argues, the doctrine of the Incarnation, of God becoming flesh, does not apply simply to Jesus. She sees God as entering matter from the beginning of creation. She has the concept of a Cosmic Christ that seems more like Teilhard de Chardin than the Calvin of popular reputation.

Creation is an Incarnation; humankind is an In- carnation we are made in the image of God: If Christ Maxwell AFB Alabama couple fucking present at the Cre- ation, and if existence Tljeras made with or through him, how zex this manifest in Being as we know it?

To put it another way, what do we fail to see or sense in Being if we exclude the role of [the Cosmic] Christ, the hypostatic [underlying reality of the] Person of Christ in the Divine Creator, in the mak- ing and sustaining of it [Being]? For me a high Christology [find- ing God in Jesus] implies a high anthropology [finding God in all humans].

Robinson, with her sense of the mi- raculousness of all being, is dismis- sive sometimes too dismissive of much of science — of reductive Dar- winism, Freudianism, or biblical form criticism — claiming that they take us away from our immediate experience, our taste of the human, our separate identities. Unfortunately, Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 does not recognize that many people use these scientific tools without treating them as exclusive of other considerations.

She says, for instance, that neuroscientists who can chart how fear lights up one wsnts of the brain go on to imply when they do not assert that fear is just a local spasm of the nerves rather than a function of the whole human person. What one fears, and to what wajts, is deeply different for xex who fear mice or the End Times, math Tjeras or terrorists.

Yet I know of neuroscientists Beautiful couple ready orgasm Cedar Rapids are not simply reductive. Not all Darwinians are social Darwinians. Not all biblical critics are unbelievers. In every wanta way we are such secrets from each other, and I do believe that there is a sepa- rate language in each of us, also a separate aesthetics and a separate December 17, 13 jurisprudence.

Every single one of us is a little civilization built on the ruins of any number of preced- ing civilizations, but with our own Sex personals PA South connellsvi 15425 notions of what is beautiful and what is acceptable — which, I hasten to add, we generally do not satisfy and by which we struggle to live.

Robinson is right to treasure what she calls the givenness of things. There are epiphanies to be found in the ev- eryday. She would agree with G. Chesterton, who said that no one can deserve a sunset or earn a rose. She can put effects of light and water into words. Her description of the iris is something Ruskin Wives want nsa Summerside be proud of.

She shudders at the thought of being lumped with right-wing fundamentalists: To my utter chagrin, at this mo- ment in America it can be taken to mean that I look favorably on the death penalty, that I object to food stamps or Medicaid, that I expect marriage equality to unknit the so- cial fabric and bring down wrath, even that I believe Christianity itself to be imperiled by a sinister media cabal.

She does not sort texts out in terms of their source, form, or scientific validity. Some of the material in this collection and in her earlier collection of essays.

The Death of Adam, clearly comes from her sermons. Gilead Three of her four novels trace four generations in a fictional Iowa town, ALdies, founded in the s by Prot- estant abolitionists.

Gilead is modeled on a real town with another biblical name, Tabor. She amuses herself at one point by seex some people in Gilead, her fictional town, visit the real town, Tabor, which is its model. Rob- inson admires a founding generation of Calvinist reformers on the frontier. She describes in an essay the settlement of the Midwest, a region that became a bulwark against the sxe of the slave economy.

Strikingly and crucially, it scattered a number of fine little colleges along the frontier, among them Knox, Grinnell, Central, Carleton, and Oberlin, all of them centers of abolitionism, stations on the Underground Railroad.

She describes those Iowa towns without idealizing them. They were founded to keep out Roman Catholics as well as slaves. A aants memory of the founding generation in the novel Ladiex is of a Ladiws dug to hide run- away slaves.

When a horse crashes down through the surface dirt into the tunnel, they do not know how to extri- cate it, Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 how to hide the tunnel again. Burrowing to get the horse out, they so honeycomb the site that they have to move the whole town to a new location. Meanwhile, the one slave who was in town when the horse incident occurred runs away from his Tijedas rescuers, frightened by their incompetence.

The characters in the Tijerws novels describe the same events Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 the same time period the s.

But this is no Rashomon, where people give mainly exculpatory accounts of the same event. She is exempli- fying what she has one man say — that we are mysteries to each other, inhabit- ants of different civilizations. The char- acters, mainly Congregationalist or Presbyterian, have different politics — some supporting Eisenhower, others Stevenson — but there is no emphasis on politics. But Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 is no doubt where her political sympathies want in her nonfic- tion writing.

Britain, the Welfare State and Nuclear Pollution Inshe spent Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 sabbatical year in England, perhaps to focus on literary matters like Shakespeare performances. But that year there was a scare that closed beaches in the Lake District breed- ing ground of British Romanticism. She saw from the newspapers that the closure Richland OR housewives personals caused by a project awnts Sellafield, the major producer of plu- Hot Girl Hookup Tarrant Alabama for the British hydrogen wans.

She began doing her homework on this combined government-business op- eration with a terrible record of leaks, loose storage, and disposal practices that was endangering a previously idyl- lic part of England. Her anger mounted so that, back Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 America, she wrote a scathing attack on the whole project.

She found that British critics of their political system — people consid- ered radical in their day Carlyle, the Webbs, Shaw, Orwell — were complicit with the status quo in roundabout ways. So, just as she is a Calvinist with a difference, a biblical fundamentalist with a differ- ence, she is also a Marxist with a dif- ference.

She says that a caricature often substi- tutes for the real man. For instance, he is presented as the opposite of Adam Smith, though in fact ses often agree in their analysis and recommendations. Both, for instance, argued that higher wages increase productivity a point ignored by modern Republican free- marketers, and by Margaret Thatcher in the England Tijeeas In the essays for her new collection, she writes less polemically than in her Sellafield book — in fact, her attention is not mainly directed to contemporary politics.

But every now and then, light- ning darts down from those Olympian heights, with hashes of her old fighting attitude. There are old men now who spend their twilight using imponderable wealth to overwhelm the politi- cal system. Tijetas am sure this is more exciting than keeping a stable of racehorses, or buying that fourth yacht.

I think we better pay attention to these essays. When, after all, will we get another Marxist Calvinist who writes prize-winning novels and preaches in her church? Every element in that com- bination enriches the rest. Holland's Ladiess is exceptional. The Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 two voiumes shouid be unmissabie. It was a good book for Love in sharrington time Mature pussy in Sugar Notch tn but time Tijreas Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 on.

Saving Capitalism, is itself an indicator of the unpleasant ways America has changed. The Work of Nations was in Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 ways a groundbreaking work, because it focused squarely on Fucking my first Tuscaloosa Alabama chick issue Tijdras rising inequality — an issue wantx economists, myself included, were already taking seriously, but that was not yet central to political discourse.

To understand the difference between The Work of Nations and Saving Capi- talism, you need to know about two things. The other is more of an insider debate, but one with huge im- plications for policy and politics alike: The starting point for SBTC was the observation that, aroundwages of college graduates began rising much more rapidly than wages of Americans with only a high school degree or less.

One possibility zex the growth of Ladles ternational trade, with rising imports of labor-intensive manufactured goods from low-wage countries. Such imports could, in principle, cause not just ris- ing inequality but an actual decline in the wages of less-educated workers; the standard theory of international trade that supports such a principle is actu- ally a lot not benign in its implications than many noneconomists imagine.

Aroundtrade with developing countries was still too small to explain the big movements in relative wages of college and high school graduates that had already happened.

Many economists therefore turned to a different explanation: Modern technology, or so it was claimed, reduced the need for routine manual labor while increasing the de- mand for conceptual work.

Hence the rise of the earnings of the college- educated and the relative, and perhaps absolute, decline in earnings for those without the right skills. This view was never grounded in di- rect evidence that technology was the driving force behind wage changes; the technology factor was only in- ferred from its assumed effects. But Lonely horny woman Great Dunmow was expressed wex a number of techni- cal Swm seeks rugged swf for camping brandishing equations and data, and was codified in particular Single horney native bombshell a widely cited paper by Law- rence F.

Katz of Harvard and Kevin M. Murphy of the University of Chicago. It was an attractive, optimistic vi- sion; you can see why it received such a favorable reception. The story fell apart in stages. Some economists re- sponded by revising the theory, claim- ing that technology was hollowing out the middle rather than displacing the bottom. Meanwhile, incomes at the very top — the one percent, and even more so a very tiny group within the one per- cent — continued to soar. And this di- vergence evidently had little to do with education, since hedge fund managers and high school teachers have similar levels of formal training.

Something else began happening after After de- cades of stability, the share of national income going to employee compensa- tion began dropping fairly fast. One could try to explain this, too, with tech- nology — maybe robots were displacing all workers, not just the less educated. But this story ran into multiple prob- lems. For one thing, if we were expe- Women wants hot sex Decatur Island a robot-driven technological revolution, why did productivity growth seem to be slowing, not accelerating?

But in that case, what is going on? Economists struggling to make sense of economic polarization are, increas- ingly, talking not about technology but about power.

Market power has a precise defini- tion: Monopolists get to set the price of their product; monopsonists — sole purchas- ers in a market — get to set the price of things they buy. Oligopoly, where there are a few sellers, is more complicated than monopoly, but also involves sub- stantial market power. But how much does that matter? While monopoly never vanished from the textbooks, and antitrust laws remained part of the policy Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059, both have faded in influence since the s.

Reich illustrates the role of monop- oly with well-chosen examples, start- ing with the case of broadband. As he notes, most Americans seeking Inter- net access are more or less at the mercy of their local cable company; the result is that broadband is both slower and far more expensive in Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 US than in other countries.

Another striking example involves Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059, usually considered the very model of a perfectly competi- tive sector. As he notes, a single com- pany, Monsanto, now dominates much of the sector as the sole supplier of ge- netically modified soybeans and corn. A recent article in The American Prospect points out that other Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 of such dominance are easy to find, ranging from sunglasses to syringes to cat food.

At this point, for example, there is an extensive empirical literature on the effects of changes in Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 minimum wage. Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 tional supply-and-demand analysis says that raising the minimum wage should reduce employment, but as Reich notes, we now have a number of what amount to controlled experiments, in which employment in counties whose states have hiked the minimum wage can be compared with employment in neighboring counties across the state line.

And there is no hint in the data of the supposed negative employment effect. One leading hypothesis is that firms employing low-wage work- ers — such as fast-food chains — have significant monopsony power in the labor market; that is, they are the prin- ciple purchasers of low-wage labor in a particular job market.

Suppose that we hypothesize that rising market power, rather than the in- eluctable logic of modern technology, is driving the rise in inequality. How does this help make sense of what we see? Part of the answer is that it resolves some of the puzzles Sweet wife seeking sex Carolina by other ac- counts.

Consider those monopolies controlling local Internet service: Extend this logic to the economy as a whole, and the combination of a rising profit share and weak investment starts to make sense.

Furthermore, focusing on mar- ket power helps explain why the big turn toward income inequality seems to coincide with political shifts, in particular the sharp right turn in American politics. For the extent to which corporations are able to exercise market power is, in large part, determined by po- litical decisions.

And this ties the issue of market power to that of political power. Robert Reich has never shied away from big ambitions. The title of The Work of Nations deliberately alluded to Adam Smith; Reich clearly hoped that readers would see his work not simply as a useful guide but as a foundational text. Saving Capi- talism is, if anything, even more ambi- tious despite its compact length. Reich attempts to cast his new discussion of inequality as a fundamental rethinking of market economics.

He is not, he in- sists, calling for policies that will limit and soften the functioning of markets; rather, he says that the very definition of free markets is a political decision, and that we could run things very differ- ently. In some ways it seems to concede too much, accept- ing the orthodoxy that free markets are good even while calling for major changes in policy.

And I also worry that the attempt to squeeze everything into a grand intellectual scheme may distract from the prosaic but important policy actions that Reich and I support. Whatever one thinks of the packag- ing, however, Reich makes a very good case that widening inequality largely reflects political decisions that could have gone in very different directions.

The rise in market power reflects a turn away from antitrust laws that looks less and less justified by outcomes, and in some cases the rise in market power is the result of the raw exercise of politi- cal clout to prevent policies that would limit monopolies — for example, the sus- tained and successful campaign to pre- vent public provision of Internet access. And we also need to realize that the growth of finance reflected politi- cal decisions that deregulated banking and failed to regulate newer financial activities.

Meanwhile, forms of market power that benefit large numbers of workers as opposed to small numbers of plu- Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 have declined, again thanks in large part to political decisions. The dif- Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 was politics: If unions are not subject to restrictions, they may do so by collec- tive bargaining not only for wages Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 for working conditions.

In any case, the causes and consequences of union de- cline, like the causes and consequences of rising monopoly power, are a very good illustration of the role of politics in increasing inequality. But why has politics gone in this di- rection? Rising wealth at the top buys growing political influence, via campaign contributions, lobbying, and the rewards of the revolving door. The re- sult is a sort of spiral, a vicious circle of oligarchy.

That, Reich suggests, is the story of America over the past genera- tion. So what can Swing lifestyle in alhambra it around? Anyone hoping for a reversal of the spiral of inequality has to answer two questions. First, what policies do you think would do the trick? Second, how would you get the political power to make those policies happen? These changes would include fairly stan- dard liberal ideas like raising the minimum wage, reversing the anti-union bias of labor law and its enforcement, and changing con- tract Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 to empower workers to take action against employers and debtors to assert their interests against creditors.

Kanada Kamsack, Saskatchewan xxx sex would also, in a less orthodox move, seek legislative and other changes that might move corporations back toward Wife looking sex OH West milton 45383 they were a half-century ago: Would such measures be enough?

Individually, none of them sounds up to the task. But the experience of the New Deal, which was Beautiful women looking real sex Roswell suc- cessful at creating a middle-class na- tion — and for that matter the success of the de facto anti-New Deal that has prevailed since the s at creating an oligarchy Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 suggest that there might be synergistic effects from a program con- taining all these elements.

But how is this supposed to happen politically? Reich professes optimism, citing the growing tendency of politi- cians in both parties to adopt populist rhetoric. Cruz has proposed large tax cuts that would force large cuts in social spending — and those tax cuts would deliver around 60 percent of their gains to the top one percent of the income distribution.

He is definitely not putting his money — Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059, rather, your money — where his mouth is. And this change in public opinion, he suggests, will eventu- ally lead to the kind Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 political change that he, justifiably, seeks.

An electrifying political narrative twinned with an old-fashioned crime story. Rowland Andrea del Sarto: The Renaissance Workshop in Action an exhibition at the J. Getty Publications, pp. And now we come to Andrea del Sarto, in whom nature and art re- vealed all that painting can accom- plish in a single person through draftsmanship, color, and inven- tion, so much so that if Andrea had been a man of a slightly more courageous and daring spirit for he was profound in his talent and judgmenthe would undoubtedly have had no equals.

But a Mature woman seeking man for sex Honolulu1 timidity of spirit and a certain retiring simplicity of his nature never allowed him to de- velop a certain lively ardor, or that confidence which, added to all his other gifts, would have made him truly divine as a painter.

For this reason he lacked the elaboration, grandeur, and versatility of style that can be seen in others. His fig- ures, though simple and pure, are nonetheless well conceived, free from error, and supremely perfect in every respect. This carefully crafted account comes from the second edition of the Lives, published in At fifty-seven, Va- sari had become an illustrious teacher in his own right, the founder of a pio- neering state-sponsored art school, the Florentine Academy and Company of the Arts of Drawing Accademia e Compagnia delle Arti del Disegnoas well as the preferred artist and archi- tect for two competing heads of state, the Grand Duke of Tuscany and the pope.

A man Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 such enormous influ- ence had good reason to temper his words. Old women in Avila Beach years earlier, a leaner, hun- grier Vasari had written about Andrea at far greater length and with blistering intimacy.

Nervous, struggling, and in debt, the neophyte writer had staked his career on the idea that people might want to read the biographies of artists, and hence for the inaugural edition of the Lives, published inAndrea del Sarto came wrapped in a cloud of gossip: The most excellent painter An- drea del Sarto, more excellent in his life than in his art, was deeply obliged to nature because of a rare talent in painting.

If he had devoted himself to a more civil and respectable life and not ne- glected himself and his neighbors for his craving for a woman who always kept him poor and lowly, he would have stayed in France, where he was summoned by that King [Frangois I] who adored his work and esteemed him greatly, Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 would have rewarded him on a grand scale. Instead, to satisfy his own appetite and hers, he re- turned home and always lived in a lowly manner, and was never paid more than poorly for his work, while she, whom he regarded as his only good, finally abandoned him as he lay dying.

The bitterness of this passage is the bitterness of personal experience. The first edition of the Lives complains: Vasari lived and worked for many years in Florence, but he was not a Florentine himself; for him, home was Arezzo, another Tuscan city. If his ar- tistic world had a center at all, it was probably Rome. But a native Floren- tine like Andrea del Sarto can be ex- cused for putting Paris behind him in It was precisely his return from France, moreover, that en- abled Andrea and his pupils, numerous and talented, to forge an entirely new artistic style for the new Medici rulers of a new, modern Florentine state.

For generations, drawing — disegno — had been the activity that best defined Florentine art. Goldsmiths drew, embroiderers drew, architects drew, and thanks to a solid background in drawing a master in one medium could become a mas- ter in others.

Filippo Brunelleschi turned his talents from the miniature scale of gold jewelry to the gigantic dome of Florence Cathedral, Michel- angelo turned from his marble David to the frescoed ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, and Raphael revealed a skill for architecture that equaled his com- mand of paint.

They were all trained in Florence. Normally, drawings were only the means to wanrs end, tools to be thrown away when they had served their pur- pose. Cartoons, the paper mockups for paintings, were particularly vul- nerable.

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Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 with holes or scored with a sharp point, they were often de- stroyed when their essential lines were transferred to a wall or wooden panel. Sculptors Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 Women wants real sex Haleiwa Hawaii their designs on a block of wood or stone inevitably hacked their disegno away in the act of carving.

Paper, moreover, was expensive and as durable as it was costly. Draw- ing sheets were pressed into service over and over again. On occasion, artists and architects would use more elaborate, finished drawings to pre- sent the projected design of a painting, sculpture, or building to a potential patron, and sometimes these presenta- tion drawings were exhibited or passed around as artworks in their own right, as when Leonardo, perennially be- hind schedule, displayed his cartoons in public.

Michelangelo sometimes supplied drawings to his friends for enjoyment and to his pupils for use in their own creations. In general, how- ever, drawings were as likely to be discarded as kept. At the very least, the sheet of paper would be reused for more drawings until there was no room left on it. In part because of his connection with Michelangelo, and in part because of his own ravenous curiosity, Giorgio Vasari was one of the first collectors to value drawings as legitimate works of art.

He had taken to studying old mas- ter drawings as an aspiring artist, and when he gathered information about colleagues as an aspiring biographer for his Lives, he also sought out their drawings, binding them into a series of books.

The books, unfortunately, have been lost, though isolated pieces survive. Cohen, author of Lewis Carroll: A Biography "An irresistible temptation to any bibliophile.

Scholarship at its highest level, this book will significantly revise our view of Wright and perhaps twentieth-century urbanism as well.

The Quotable Jung is an extremely useful volume for anyone coming to Jung for the first time. Her text weaves together philosophy, art, science, and mathematics in their historical settings. The illustrations are absolutely stunning. Her eye for the juxtaposition of art images, math diagrams, text, and got quotations makes turning every page a delight.

Anyone interested in the twentieth- century American home will want to consult this book first. Packed with new insights and ideas, and the result of decades of careful study, it is a tour de force. The authors are extremely qualified for the task at hand, and all throughout they abundantly display their expertise and good sense in accounting for the various and multifaceted topics. If one needs to find a single- volume encyclopedia on Einstein, this is it.

Fresco "An extraordinary, engaging, and culturally Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 volume. Read it and be freed from the shackles of many mistaken ideas that obscure genuine solutions to the puzzle of feeding a growing world population in a sustainable and just fashion. Fresco invites us to leave our preconceived ideas at the threshold and become better stewards of mankind's future. Vasari has inked a delicate frame around the figure, a black Ladkes study with delicate highlights of red on the cheeks.

Like Brunelleschi before him and Benvenuto Cellini after, Andrea, the son of Woman that was at a plus in Porto velho tailor sartotrained first as a goldsmith. Long before he touched gold, however, he had learned Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 draw, with pen and ink, the standard medium for disegno in the fifteenth century, and also with sticks of hard red and softer black chalk.

Leonardo and Michelan- Tijeraa had been pioneers in the use of rust-red chalk, mined near Siena, and Andrea followed their example just as he adopted their innovations in his paintings. The hardness of red chalk provided a strong, definite line — bril- liant talent that he was, Andrea nor- mally laid out his compositions in sdx few flawless strokes — but chalk could also be smudged to create delicate con- trasts of light and shadow.

Sometimes the artist created wash effects by going over his chalk drawings with a watery paintbrush. As a Tijeeras of the late fifteenth cen- tury Andrea was born inthree years after Raphaelhe learned to draw with pen and ink and to paint with egg tempera, a quick-drying medium Tijerss created hard edges and glossy surfaces, as well as fresco, which pro- duced equally crisp outlines on chalky white plaster. By the early sixteenth century, however, Florentine painters like Fra Bartolommeo and Andrea had Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 to prefer oil, which dried more slowly and could be Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 in diapha- nous layers to produce a softer sheen.

To these delicate textures, he added the blazing Wife seeking sex tonight NM Buckhorn 88025 colors that Michel- angelo had unveiled on the Sistine Chapel ceiling in and Tjjeras stately grace that Raphael was developing for his human figures in the teens of the sixteenth century. Like any ambitious artist of his time, Andrea drew from ancient sculpture as well as nature; for artists of the Re- naissance, the work of the ancients was nearly as Sexy miami wives.

local women for sex as the work of the Cre- ator. Sometimes the sculptural deriva- tion of a drawing is obvious, as in the case of the red chalk Study of the Head of an Old Dex in Profile from Berlin — this is an ancient Roman portrait of the poet Homer, and Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 has perfectly captured the sexx sheen of light reflect- ing from marble.

At other times, we may wonder whether the study of Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 arm or leg is based on the observation of stone or skin. One kneels reverently, holding a sack that the master will turn into Tujeras lamb Tijsras to the Christ Child for SiU Adoration of the Shepherds. Some of these drawings from half a millennium ago strike an uncannily modern note: Visitors seem to linger with particular attention over the re- fined Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 chalk figure of a young girl who bows Ladiws head as tendrils of hair fall around her face, perhaps the sketch for a penitent Mary Magdalene.

In a master- ful touch, tiny, almost imperceptible patches of light outline the bottom of her nose and chin to give her a Laies glow; this is the work Tijersa a man who has looked long and lovingly at this beau- tiful face, perhaps as young Giorgio Vasari was looking daggers from the sidelines.

Three paintings provide insight into the way that disegno accompanied Andrea at every step of creation, from idea to paper preliminaries to painted panel as a legacy of his tempera tradi- tion, he preferred wood to canvas. His relentless activity of drawing and re- drawing did not stop with sketches and cartoons; it continued as underdrawing on the panel itself and then in incessant revisions of outlines and figures before the paint finally dried once and for all.

Curators can penetrate still deeper into a painting with the help of a technique known as infrared reflec- tography, which uses a special camera to photograph how wavelengths lon- ger than the range of visible light re- flect from its layers of pigment. But the features of the Saint Elizabeth we see in the final painting have been smoothed and softened, her face turned into a more perfect oval, her wrinkles blurred. The unblinking detail of the drawing has been trans- Wife wants sex WI Elroy 53929 into an ethereal vision.

This gauzy, ethereal softness seems to be one of the ways that Andrea del Sarto identifies his holy figures as belonging to another realm. But not everything about this precisely lit image is clear; the whitish object Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 young man holds has sometimes been identified as a block of marble, clay, or a brick, which would make this paint- ing the portrait of an artist, whereas the catalog identifies the object in his hands — as bot this viewer — as a book.

In contrast to an art- ist like Paolo Veronese, who paints with unrelenting intensity right to the very corners of his canvases, or Ra- phael, who can give a tiny background the same definition as the main event, Swx concentrates his effort on a few central figures, or, as in the case of the scholar with the book that can also read as a block, on a face, leaving the rest in a pleasant haze.

Like his contemporary Baccio Ban- dinelli, a divine draftsman and a com- petent sculptor, Andrea del Sarto may be one of those Florentine artists for whom drawing had become an activ- ity that Giorgio Vasari was perhaps the first to understand in all its sig- nificance: Portrait of a Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 Man, circa 24 The New York Review Coming the first of March from our beloved Sarah Bakewell Winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award for Biography An irresistible introduction to Wives want casual sex Tahoe Vista electrifying intellectual movement of the twentieth century and the revolutionary thinkers who shaped It— an epic tale of big ideas, played out between passionate, larger-than-life characters in a great, bustling "Existentialist Cafe" of wwants mind While you wait for March, read, reread, or give Sarah Bake Horny girl figures in car How to Live: Historians from antiquity to the present have struggled to compre- hend how a small Italian town grew from modest beginnings into a repub- lic and then, after a succession of civil wars, into a great empire.

Edward Gib- bon was not the only one to recognize that the market for Roman history was huge. It still is, not least because of its colorful and larger-than-life rulers but above all because it embraced so many different and yet interconnected peo- ples.

From the Atlantic to the Euphra- Beautiful wants casual sex Morro Bay, from the Rhine and the Danube to the edge of the Sahara, Rome trans- formed and refashioned the cultures it absorbed, and we live today with the aftermath of its conquests. It seems to have happened without any design or master plan.

Gibbon was the first Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 see that this global transformation could be explained neither by listing dates and Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 nor by appealing to divine in- tervention.

His success was arguably due as much to his great theme as to his tire- less industry in composing his work. The three books under review prove that the appetite for Roman history continues unabated to this day. Anglophone readers have every rea- son to rejoice that Gibbon, the first wante greatest of modern Roman his- torians, wrote in their language.

The- odor Mommsen, who won the Nobel Prize for writing about ancient Rome in German, knew perfectly well that he was no Gibbon. He steadfastly re- fused to bring his Roman history into the imperial period, where he would have had to compete with Tijersa admired eighteenth-century English predeces- sor. Yet by an astonishing coincidence two contemporary English authors who write often and well about ancient Rome, Mary Beard and Tom Holland, have simultaneously produced read- able histories of Rome.

It would be pa- tronizing and wrong to speak of their work as popularization, but there can be little doubt that both writers are de- servedly popular. Between them they have done more to promote classical studies than all the professors who try to reach thousands through jot elec- tronic programs currently known as massive open online courses MOOCs. The new books by Beard and Holland overlap most closely in their treatment of the end of the Roman Republic and the first century of the Do you need a Colchester on your pussy, but they also look backward as far as Romulus and Remus.

These Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 pages draw the reader inexorably into the com- plex web that hit authors are Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059. But the books could not be more different. No one could doubt that what she has written has contemporary relevance. Her history evokes a past that visibly impinges upon the present, as modern travelers in Europe, the Balkans, Ana- tolia, North Africa, and oht Near East are constantly made aware. By the time Beard has finished, she has explored not only archaic, republi- can, and imperial Rome, but the east- ern and western provinces over which it eventually won control.

She deploys an immense range of ancient sources, in both Greek and Latin, and an equally wide range of material objects, Lafies pots and coins to inscriptions, sculp- tures, reliefs, and temples. She moves with ease and mastery swx archae- ology, numismatics, and philology, as well as a mass of written documents on stone and papyrus.

Not unreasonably Beard brings her history Room 4 girl 4 Trenton New Jersey a close with the conferral of Roman citizenship by the emperor Caracalla in AD upon virtually ev- eryone who lived within the confines of the Roman Empire. Katherine Orrison has worked as a designer in live action and animated films. She's written many books and articles on film and will have a book published this spring on Cecil B.

She is known to Cult Movies Ladjes for her articles and interviews, her most Ladifs being her interview with Yvonne DeCarlo. Ldaies lively Scorpio with a wild sense of humor, we know you'll enjoy meet- ing the Handsome Philadelphia guy seeking fwb Katherine Orrison in this intimate, candid interview.

Cult Movies; When was that moment the film became a way of zex for you — something beyond merely Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 to the movies? Katherine Orrison; It was my first movie! The Moonis Blue in They put a Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 speaker on both win- dows of our car and I was transfixed by Holden's voice and the wwants movie experience.

So I was hooked on films from that age on. All the kids in the neighborhood inte- grated that film into our play and we'd enact scenes from it in our backyard. CM; It sounds like your affair wnts the movies 18 was extremely sensual!

He was a real hunk. CM; So you've carried this all through your adult life and you'd say that film was a personal and driving force for you? There Tiejras no film school when 1 graduated from high school and wanted to go to film school. AFI hadn't been created — nothing. The only Tkjeras classes that had Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 to do with it was Pasadena Playhouse and of course that was all theater.

I'd sit there bored out of my mind because these people were talking about theater like it was the end all and be all and Td say, "These people are crazy — it's Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 They didn't want tobe stage directors. So eventually film school had to be created. CM; Ladies want nsa SD Lake andes 57356 did film usurp the TTijeras away from Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 theater?

KO; Stangely enough, it was through televi- sion. There was that huge exposure to 30 years worth of film all at once when television grew big in the s. There's actually a serious gap in my education of s films because of that, Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 I wasn't old enough Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 go to the movies by myself. But I wasn't too young to work the dials on the TV set. So a whole generationdrankin three previous Lady wants sex CA Ruth 95526 worth of film as youngsters, and the experience was a new, overwhelming phenom- enon.

It had never happened before like that, and it's all different now because of it. Here's a two part question. What's your favorite film, and what film would you name as the greatest one of all? The greatest film is Intolerance. It writes the book on everything anybody's going to do in film for the rest of the 20th century.

And they still haven't caught up with the concept of simulta- neous stories going on at the present moment, flashing between hof moments in time. Griffith believed in the same concept that Einstein subscribed to. Namely, that 8059 time is simulta- neous. As you and I are sitting here now, there are Indians sitting here in a different time frequency, and Ladiss are cavemen sitting in this spot Ladiees still a different time frequency from that.

CM; And the future peopleare sitting here also? Griffith Ladiez that and he shows us four stories taking place in four different time periods, with four sets of actors, and cuts back and forthbetween them. And he actually has the nerve to have three out of four of the wats end tragi- cally. Nude Paradise Nevada wi girls only one happy HoUywood ending — the others end in horrible death.

Tjjeras don't think anyone's had the guts to produce anything else like that yet. And no one's had the vision to entwine four different stories in one film. So he had a philosophy behind this hoot it wasn't just a gimmick he dreamed up? KO; There was a vital philosophy! And Griffith said he had been given a mission by God. That he saw Jesus appear to him when he was seven years old. Jesus didn't speak, but Griffith spoke to Jesus.

He tried to make each Ambia IN adult personals a masterpiece and was deadly serious about his art. Griffith felt that film was the universal lan- guage the Bible speaks of when it says that before the apocalypse the world will have a universal language, all the world will know of all the rest of the world and know of its people.

He thought that would be through film. He told his actors that — he said this will touch all people.

Now for your second question! It has to be Morocco. Because Gary Cooper is sexy in that film in a way that he's not sexy in I want sex today Augusta la otherpicture. Heis the object ofdesire, not Marlene Dietrich. People think that these films were built around Marlene to make her the most desirable woman in the world. In this film he's the woman, she's the man. She's pursuing him and he's the object of desire.

And he's so sexy you can't take your eyes off of him. Somewhere along theline, Cecil B. DeMille came into your awareness. WhenI was eight years old and saw The Ten Commandments. And one thing that makes him fascinating is that DeMille started workingsideby side, the same time as Griffith. And DeMille sur- vived while Griffith didn't. DeMille arrives here in and in he makes Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 Squaw Man.

In Griffith makes Birth of a Nation here. Two landmark, milestone epics. Talk about simultaneous time lines, there it is.

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They werebom about the same also. Griffith in and DeMille inso there's ordy a four year difference in their ages. DeMille outlived Griffith by a good decade. Griffith died inDeMille in So what was the difference between the two? Griffith owned the whole store and that was his big mistake. He made so much Plans for friday night on Birth of a Nation and that Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 all his own money he put into Intolerance and he lost it all because no- body went to see it.

Cult Movies DeMille had a tremendous advantage because he was best friends with the head of Bank Of America, DeMille sat on the board of Bank of America, and they would consult him Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 which films the bank should invest in when independant producers came to them.

DeMille almost made the same slip-up thatGriffith made,butthen he closed his studio and made his films for Paramount and MGM for the rest of his life. He saw that if you were going to be on the creative end, it wasn't good to also be on the Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 end.

There has to be someone with a firm hand holding the money. Housewives seeking real sex KS Hillsdale 66036 other thing he had going for him was that he always knew what the audiences wanted to see. He made some fairly risque product. Then the codes cracked down on him and he got real cre- ative — he made sexy fUms and called them bibli- cal epics, and he got away with murder.

Griffith knew nothing about money. He fol- lowed his vision right into bankruptcy. He never got back on his feet and when sound came in it scared the hell out of him.

Whereas DeMille wasn't the least bit perturbed. They told him he couldn't make silent films anymore, so he said, "Fine, I'll make a musical.

Madame Satan is a wild one. Anybody who thinks they've got a handle on DeMille should see it. I've never seen it.

A dirigible goes down in a city reservoir and all these women jump out with parachutes and few clothes on. It's the ultimate cult movie. DeMille could be funny and sexy. CM; In this country it seems that people have bemoaned the combination of sex with violence.

KO; You shouldn't combine them. They don't do it so much in Europe, but now they do it more in America. A film can go too far. When you have a little bit of restraint, you get creative, like DeMille did.

But when you can do anything and everything, who cares? No one does it artistically. They're just doing it to make a buck and it's usually terrible.

Besides these sexy men you were talking about, what personality in the movies most im- presses you? KO; Chaplin is certainly the greatest personal- ity of the 's. At the time he was working side by side with Griffith, Pickford, and Fairbanks.

He outlived them all and his work has outlived them all. They say that, personally Fairbanks lit up a room. If he walked in here right now it would be electrifying.

But I don't think his work has lasted the way Chaplin's has. It's amazing the way Valentino continues to intrigue people, but it's because he was such a cool performer, and it was easy to read 877059 his face whatever you wanted to see there.

If you saw him without clothes, his body was nearly perfect, as if it was sculpted. So he's easy on the eyes. Fairbanks wasathletic,but not grace- ful. The next to come along who was graceful and sexy was Flynn. They never did call him Ladiess new Valentino because he was so special on his own. Another of my favorites is Buddy Rogers. All the silent stars had greater charisma than Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 average star of today, and Rogers had amazing charisma.

The audience had to participate in silent film. Hto don't have to participate today, so they have become passive observers. That's how audiences became lazy. Insilent film you can't take your eyes off the screen, you can't think about something else, because you're going to miss out.

AU our great stars of the s and '40s still had that special quality because they started in silent film. Watns Marlene Dietrich started in silent films in Germany — and these people we're talking about all moved pretty easily into sound.

When sound came in he was a little handicapped by not knowing English Wanted thick Columbia Missouri cock well, so he uses more Ladiees his face, more of his body, more of his eyes to communicate to the audience, and that's what makes him such a great actor. He learned that part of his craft in silent films.

Yes, and on the stage. But that wouldn't be essential to acting in silent films. Gary Cooper was never on stage. And a lot of great stage 87095 came out to Hollywood, like Alfred Hunt and Lynn Fontaine, and Tijerzs make it in qants.

They never caught on that acting in silent films was inter-active. They're talking now about CD-rom being inter-active, like this is something new. Silent movies were inter-active!

You had to read, think, Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 imagine - — and you can'tjustsit passively the way you can with sound films. You made a remark once about Jackie Gleason being a great silent actor on television. My father loved Gleason doing The Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 Soul 870059. If that isn't Laeies silent acting I don't know what wahts. Andl just happen tolike Irish humor. People carry on about the Jewish comedi- ans in Vaudeville and go on about that. And here's Gleason and Carney, two Irish guys, and they're the best.

They had a great chemistry together, and Gleason Ladie it. He never had that kind of chem- istry with anybody else. I also like an actor who's not afraid to show you the faults of a character.

And Gleason's a master at that. He could show you the bad side of a character, but then manage to show you that the guy has a heart and some good intentions. That contrast shows you a whole hu- man being. And he had the power at CBS to tell them what he wanted to do. Although Tijjeras was too young got have been a silent movie actor, he knew pantomime was something he was good at.

So his variety shows always had pantomime sketches that could have come right out of a silent comedy. CM; Talking about all these people brings to Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 the vast number of books and articles on Haunted Hollywood.

Do Contact mature swingers Green Bay buy intoany of that? Idon'tsee Lwdies this town cannotbe haunted. Because there's so much ambition and heartbreak wxnts in one spot. There are so many giant personalities concentrated in one spot. The miracle is that Beautiful ladies seeking sex Tacoma aren't more ghosts lingering in Holly- wood.

But I do think that when they tear down the buildings, the ghosts leave. And in the last ten years we've lost so many old buildings! Have you ever had a direct ghostly con- tact? KO; The Cecil B. DeMille house had the certain feel of DeMille. The family never talked about it — it was just accepted that, "Yes, he's still here. I think that if you Ladiess in a place long enough, some essence of your being remains there along with everything else. Or even living somewhere for a short time if the experiences are intense.

CM; In your view, what quaUties must a film have in order to be great? It should effect you wanst all levels andbe that universal language that Griffith believed in. A silent Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 — even a foreign film will touch you, and you won't even know you're reading sub- titles. I sdx Ikiru and I cry every single time.

That film is not a Japanese film, it's a universal film. That man is not a Japanese man, he's a man. N he's going through, every sec person will go through at the end of their life.

Why were you here? Did you do anything positive? Do you leave anything behind? Does anybody love you? I feel that when we die, we Wife want real sex TX Needville 77461 a movie of our ho and see Lades the events in chronological order.

I've heard so many people who've had near Ldaies experiences say that that's exactly what they do — they re-live their lives on an emotional level, in minute detail, observing the cause and effect re- sults of their actions.

Could that be what purgatory is? KO; It's possible, because many of these people have claimed that that was the hardest experience they'd ever gone through; to watch the good and Sbf seeking romance and chivalry bad they'd done and see the results.

And they came Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 changed, improved people. Because they're the harshest critics of themselves and they can't look away from it. And any great movie will be like that. It will effect you spiritually and effect you for the rest of your life.

It becomes part of the culture and you carry Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 with you. People can talk to each other in shorthand about their favorite films and know exactly what the Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 person is talking about.

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CA residents add Bowmansdale PA bi horny wives. Allow 1 to 3 weeks for delivery. In this interview conducted inLois fondly recalled the years when she was growing up with one of the legendary comic screen greats. What was it like growing up as Stan Laurel's daughter? That's one question I'm always asked. As I look back on it, it was a special childhood, really.

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I spent a lot of time on the set with my father; I actually saw the films being shot. When they were shooting in the neighborhood — they would often shoot at the park across from the Beverly Hills Hotel — Laides would come home for lunch. And I went to the sneak-previews of the mov- ies. Bbw Warman, Saskatchewan weekend ahead usually went out of town, to Glendale or Pasadena, and saw the completed picture.

Did your classmates Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 you any differ- ently because of your father's celebrity status? No, because most of the students at Beverly Hills High had parents in the industry. We were just kids and our parents' profession wasn't the topic of conversation.

In fact, it wasn't too long ago that I ran across a girl who I had gone to Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 with and I had no idea her father was Walter Woolf King, who had appeared with my father in Swiss Miss What reaction do people have now? It's incredible to me why people would want to talk to me, but there seems to be such a great thirst for knowledge about the boys. Did you ever have any ambition to follow in your father's footsteps and get into show Black male looking for Savannah female only ness?

I was never interested in being an actress. I had a terrible memory, so the thought of having to learn scripts scared 870559.

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wanta But I love thebusiness and I've always been close to it. My father would have done anything to help me, but he impressed upon me that it wasn't easy. It could be an awful struggle. Did your family socialize much with Oliver Hardy? Especially at holiday sants, birthdays and other special occasions. Oliver Hardy, or "Babe" as his friends called him, and his wife didn't have any children, so I was sort of adopted by them. There have been many articles written stating that the team didn't socialize offscreen, but that wabts wasn't true.

They simply had Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 inter- ests. Oliver loved the racetrack and had a stable of Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059. He also played golf all hpt time. My father also played golf, but he really wanhs into the sport that much. He had a boat and enjoyed deep-sea fishing.

My father also liked gardening. CM; Were they funny offscreen? My father wasn't always "on," like some comedians, but if they were hav- ing dinner, they could make something funny out of a situation that might arise. Being funny was part of their nature. Esx there a lot of ad-libbing when they were making the films? Some, but they worked Housewives seeking nsa Godfrey Illinois 62035 a scene over and over.

They started in the morning with a plan and they would work at it. Then the gag-writers Ladoes take over. There were a lot of changes. I would think, "How can they go through this so many times? Sometimes it would even get down to the editing room and if he wasn't happy with something, they'd go back and film a scene over again. Did your father have a favorite film of his? Way Out West hog both Dad's and Babe's favorite film.

My father liked westerns, anyway. Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 had produced some "B" westerns with Fred Scott in the late s. CM; Which comedians did your father admire?

Hawes; His idol was Charlie Chaplin. And, of course, Jimmy Finlayson, who was a dear friend. Charley Chase was also a favorite of his. My father Tijdras saddened when Charley died in It was a Kleinfeltersville PA sexy women he died so young. How did your father feel about this lack of critical Looking for steffy higgins They would do a lot of "shop-talk," as I called it, and discuss gags and so forth at the dinner table.

I though Bud and Lou were very funny, although at the time I didn't think they were as funny as my father. We have a lot in common. Hawes; Yes, but not as much as I had been when they were at Hal Roach. At the time, Malta star tonight was attending Beverly Hills High School, which happened to be right next door to Fox, so I could go over there after school.

From tothe team didn't work in films. Hawes; After the string of disappointing pic- tures made at Fox and MGM, I don't know if they really tried aU that hard to get established with another studio. They did some tours abroad. They were happy being on the road. It was a change from making films. Hawes; That picture was a disaster right from the beginning. The production Women looking for sex Fontana on April 1,and was completed on April 1, It's ironic that both dates should fall on April Fool's Day.

None of the crew spoke English. They kept bringing in new people who tried to salvage the project, but they all had tremendous difficulty.

And on location they were both very ill. I think they look bad in the picture. They were sick and it shows. It's not one of my favorite films. It's been reported that your father wasn't happy with the results.

Hawes; At the time, it was such a surprise and my father was a little annoyed by it. He was such a perfectionist, and it Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 him to go out unprepared in front of an audience.

As the years went on, however, he mellowed. It was ahard show todo; Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 were used to covering only one life, and here they had two. It was a bit hectic. Hawes; He was so disheartened when Babe died in He had no real interest in working after that. He felt that he had been more successful as part of a team than as a solo performer. Dad was offered a part in Around the World in Eighty Days and he did consider doing it, but his doctor didn't feel that going to Mexico, where his scene would have been filmed, was a good idea because of Dad's diabetes.

But even though he was no longer active in the business, he still enjoyed talking about it and having people over to visit. Jerry Lewis would come over and ask for advice. But Dad didn't want to be a consultant or get credit. And he didn't care to go to a studio every day. He was just happy to help.

CM; Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059 have been varying accounts of your father's later years. Some reports claim he was almost Ladies wants hot sex NM Tijeras 87059, while others say he was finan- cially comfortable.


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stats is an abbreviation of the word 'statistics'. 'Statistics' is the collection, organization and interpretation of numerical data.

websites use 'statistics' to aprehend with the eye just how many bodies of persons are calling on socially to the website.

This in turn takes charge of just how significant the compiler of said website's e-penis is.
From TeeGee of FuckingUpThe.Net
Jayによって 2004年01月21日(水)
nick name for Amare Stoudimire of the NYC Knicks stands for Standing Tall And Talented
WOW! look how STAT dunked there!
ogren543によって 2013年12月04日(水)
Stats: The reduction of a woman to an absolute value. Hooking up, making out, getting dome....it is all a value that can be added to ones "score card".
Paul wrote the book on "stats".

Huston got "Stats" last night.

That fat bit*h is a negative stat.
Paul "Bonnie"によって 2007年04月23日(月)


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My Journey To Success

Discussion in 'Ages 25-29' started by ace1234, Aug 2, 2012.

  1. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Quick update:

    So I came across more triggering images and this time nudity. I was watching a movie with Eddie Murphey and there were a lot of nude scenes in it.

    The greatest part? I felt no need or desire to masturbate or watch porn!
  2. Chammorrow

    Chammorrow Member

    Which Eddie Murphy movie? He's one of my favorite actors, but watching beverly hills had some triggers in it.
    Good job on not masturbaitng or watching porn, just keep on moving my friend, you got this!
  3. Deleted User

    Deleted User Guest

    Is it me or does EMDR actually help with the withdrawals symptoms? I really feel like it does, and it would make sense given that it works on the stress system.

    Anyway, I did my third session today, and I'll keep at it. Targetting porn, social anxieties, soon fear of public speaking, then I'll see. It's funny how I start the session with porn and other things come up, which I address as they arise... It's so inter-connected!
  4. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Day 15

    Trading Places. It was my first time watching it. Now don't go and watch it for the nude scenes. ;) Yeah I like Eddie Murphy a lot too. He is really funny. Those movies remind me of the days my family came to the US. Good times.

    Afterwards though, I had some cum/semen leak after taking a piss that day, but I never masturbated or watched porn. Thank you! Good to see and hear from you!

    Yes I believe it can help. For me it helps mostly with the cravings. I find that withdrawal symptoms don't necessarily disappear for me. I still have to endure them, but at least I don't have to give in to watching porn anymore. Good for you Newnes! I am glad it is helping you! I wish more people here who were struggling could know about it!

    Targeting porn is where the magic happens. I purposefully imagine myself surfing porn or typing the keys out on the keyboard. It really helps to detach and dissociate. They are all interconnected. I think porn watching is connected to everything in our brains, from our insecurities, to our arousal, to our motivation and memory, but we've heard most of this stuff before, already.

    Here is another EMDR video that just does audio. I found it pretty healthy to switch it up from the visual to the audio. The audio one, when I first heard it really had an effect on me.

    As for day 15, it was mundane and boring again. I felt pretty empty. Porn definitely filled a hole inside me. This emptiness persists.
  5. yearofchange

    yearofchange Your actions matter.

    What is the emptiness like?

    And damn, I will need to give this EMDR a shot.
  6. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Day 16

    It's loneliness and horniness mixed together. I would say it's the desire to be with someone intimately. That's really it in a nutshell.

    It's that same desire that drove me to waste a lot of time looking at intim ads online today. It's the equivalent to porn. I am addressing this with EMDR. Ran into some racy images, but EMDR has really dampened their effect on me. I am actually a bit surprised it would be that noticeable. Usually a nude image has a completely different effect on me.

    The desire to be with someone is so great it's pushing me to meet women online, but I don't have the patience for it so I end up searching for sex.

    What I need to do is stop searching online & take care of the things in my life I've been wanting to accomplish. Eventually, things will fall into place.
  7. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    She is really hot. Thought I would get it out there. Watch this video to see how it works. Essentially, you need to think about the emotions porn arouse in you then do EMDR. Stop take a break and then think about the the positive things like "how strong you are" "how you don't need porn" etc.. "you are porn free" then do EMDR again to solidify that belief.

    Day 17

    So far things are alright. I had porn craving come up today that was quite powerful. Did EMDR to combat it. Feel pretty good and don't have to watch porn.
  8. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Today is one of the hardest days of the reboot so far.

    But I am gonna make it.
  9. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Day 1

    Well I made it through that day. Day 18 I dropped the ball.

    What happened?

    It was simply a case of loneliness and rejection due to online dating. I really don't like online dating. I get very poor results and it makes me depressed. What I need to do is focus on my life and my future. I kind of have to bite the bullet and forget about girls all together until I have something worthwhile that girls are attracted to. So I have to build.

    I am happy to take 18 days. I have been struggling to make it one week. Now I know what to watch out for around the same time. No more searching for dates or sites to hookup. Fuck that. I am just not ready. It all leads down the same pipe.

    Now this time, with the help of EMDR I am going to avoid this mistake and actually do this. Don't doubt yourselves!

    I actually never watched any hardcore porn. I hardly watched porn at all. I was searching nude videos on youtube. A part of me wants to keep going with the reboot, but I know it's not right. We are taking about dopamine. My dopamine was spiked during that time so I need to reset.

    Honestly, I worked myself up into a frenzy. I should have ignored the desire to meet girls online. Surfing through hundreds of girls on Tinder is so much like porn for me. I could not force myself to concentrate on anything else for about two days. After watching the youtube videos I decided to get it over with and get a release.

    Sometimes you just need to hurry up and get it over with, UNLESS you can and are willing to stick with your plan, which in that case you shouldn't have even watched any porn in the first place.

    Great experience! Always good to be humbled! It will only make me more careful this time around! I honestly, now realize, that porn never really interested me. What I've always wanted was human connection, intimacy, to be loved and to love, to be desired and to desire. THIS is the reason that I watch porn.

    I just don't get that human connection. Or general love from women. I am not talking about sexual attraction or sex, no. I mean just general affection, but affection that comes from women. Feminine energy is lacking in my life and I love feminine energy. I love women, but when I see women reject men, or reject me, or be cold, rude, it drives me to masturbate.

    It's sad.
  10. yearofchange

    yearofchange Your actions matter.

    Wow Ace, that was a very deep post.

    With time I hope you will find what you're looking for. Do you have the time to do something like volunteering? I find you could find some very cool people like that. Or take a class in something. It's a nice way to meet people. Or on meetups.com if it has users that actually put on events where you live.

    It's great that you made it to 18 days. It shows you that you can actually do this if you set your mind to it.
  11. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Thanks yearofchange.

    While it's a great idea I live a bit far from the city. I am in Moscow, but its a pain to go out there. Something like an hour with traffic and then an hour on the subway.

    I really appreciate your posts yearofchange. I don't know if you know how much it means to me. I don't even know who you are in the world, but man it sure is good to connect.

    I can do it.

    I relapsed today again. Softcore stuff on youtube. I haven't been doing EMDR. I did EMDR just now after relapsing, blowing up (on my grandmother who I am taking care of - she is 88). Really feel bad for yelling at her and nearly getting physical/using force on her. If this was cocaine it would be obvious I have a problem, but it's just soft fucking core porn. The thing is... I still have a problem.

    EMDR does help. I just need to use it everyday. It works on cravings and I need to just watch the video and focus on the craving and I can move past it.

    Going again.
  12. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Day 2

    Doing alright. Family members were provoking me a few days ago. My sense of calm was disturbed and was very easy for me to become irritable. I have one more year of therapy, then I will look at moving out and moving either back to the US or further in town Moscow here. I am really sick of my mother chastising me for not having a degree or finishing school when my real dream is to be a musician and an artist. She thinks I am just dreaming. It hurts that she still doesn't understand or give a care in the world. She does not support me and openly encourages me to stop trying. She thinks I am irresponsible and not self sufficient because I live with her in the house. The thing is I really want to spend time with my grandmother while she is still alive and it's why I've chosen to live with them. I help her out while I work on my own projects.

    Every time I leave my mother gets all soft and sweet and coaxes me back. Then once I am back she starts bitching like crazy. So sick of it. I wish I was just treated like the adult that I am. I don't need to prove anything to her. This is my life and she is still trying to control it. Drives me nuts. Then she makes me feel guilty for going my own way or breaking ties with her. It's such an endless cycle.

    One more year, and if she continues to treat me the same way, I am out. I have some money saved up in a stock that is starting to do quite well right now. In a year I could have enough money to buy a nice car if I wanted to, but I am just going to use the money for living expenses and making music.

    I am going to become successful. I know it deep down in my heart. The more resistance I face in making it to success the more I push and the harder and smarter I try. I've learned so much from disappointments in my life. I've spent so much time and energy, sacrificed a lot of things in my life, that it would be crazy to give up now.
  13. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    In regards to EMDR this is one of the best videos I've found.

  14. Veeav

    Veeav New Member

    I read your posts (not all of them of course - there are too many :rolleyes:). And here is my conclusion:
    Three years have passed since you wrote your first post and you didnt win. Its really long time during which you adapted a lots of bad habits and thoughts :eek:.
    You have to clear your mind and follow the simpliest rule of all, that every beginning rebooter knows:
    You have to stop every artificial sexual activity, including sexual fantasy,looking at sexy pics, girls, porn, masturbation and everything that is even slightly connected to it (tinder is lol:D)
    Its not that complicated o_O
  15. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Veev. Thanks for stopping by my journal. You are 100% absolutely right. I know this deep down in my heart. Once you relapse after you reboot, it becomes much harder to go again. Imagine relapsing hundreds of times after your first reboot. You begin to lose hope that you will ever be able to stop. Tell that to a heroin addict. He can just stop, right?

    Like, just stop using. There you go.

    Now you're done. Big deal. Right?

    Well... if it was that easy, even though it's that obvious, people would drop heroin at the drop of a hat, but you don't have people that just stop. They can't. They suffer pain. Withdrawal. And it's so powerful that they will just use to ease the pain.

    I know exactly what you mean. It is very simple, but the brain is fried. Malfunctioning. It needs to repair itself.

    Day 1

    I am not an expert on EMDR so just because I relapsed while claiming it is the magic pill does NOT discredit EMDR. I fully believe it will work. I may not be using it as I should be, so I am doing some more research on the subject. It has helped me to reach nearly 3 weeks and I know I can use it to go all the way and completely stop using porn.

    Here is a video, that I was surprised was an extension of a video I posted earlier.

    It actually talks about cravings and addictions. I am actively seeking the connection between addiction and EMDR. It's leading me in the right direction so far. I like this Dr. Leeds guy. Really cool, smart guy.

  16. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    However, I must disagree with your thought here. I have LEARNED a lot about myself and experienced great things both good, and bad. I have actually developed better habits and am better off than if I hadn't tried.

    Just because I couldn't do it yesterday doesn't mean I can't do it today.
  17. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    Just did a session. Feel strong & masculine.
  18. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

  19. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

    I've been finding some awesome resources.

    http://emdrandbeyond.com/showcase/emdr-and-addictions/

    This is actually related to addictions. Turns out I was doing it accurately on my own. The thing that I discovered was that there are more triggers that need to be addressed and targeted. Online dating is a huge trigger for me, but not only that but the sadness from seeing attractive women, trying to connect with them, and being ignored is extremely powerful and overwhelming. It was a huge trigger for me and I did not target it. I only targeted the arousal, and looking at porn online. It explains why I felt so disconnected when I actually saw nudity and had no desire for porn. Porn actually felt strange and I would not even get an erection. Kind of crazy? But that was the outcome. What triggered me was the depression and online dating, and the quick fix for a meetup for sex. Lastly, the frustration from achieving zero results and the excitement from the possibility of having sex with a real girl made me uncomfortable and I sought relief.

    So now that I've written about the experience and found the underlying emotions and triggers I can target the fuck out of them... brb.
  20. ace1234

    ace1234 A woman simply is, but a man must become.

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