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How can I get an orgrasm when everything is so intense?
November 16, 2007 5:57 PM   Subscribe

[NSFW] Women of the world...how can I have an orgasm when everything just feels so intense?

I seem to to have a problem with managing the intensity of stimulation. This older question is similar in that it feels too "intense" for me, but I don't have any sexual abuse in my past. I'm in my early twenties and on my second partner and sex feels wonderful, but I can't seem to get to a full orgasm. Admittedly I'm sometimes a tense person with a stressful life, but I always look forward to sex. Mostly he manually stimulates me before and during sex. I've used a vibrator before but I don't have a good one.

Once I'm stimulated I just can't seem to handle it and I pull back. If I can relax a lot I can feel muscles all over my body start to tighten, but I have only managed to orgasm once and it required a lot of concentration, a vibrator, and a position that kept me from pulling back. Is this normal?

More importantly, is there anything I can do about it? I thought about grabbing a bottle of the lubricant that desensitizes men so they can go longer in the hopes it would moderate things.
posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (21 answers total) 14 users marked this as a favorite
IANAWoman, but i would think that maybe theres an unconscious fear of having something bad happen when you finally go 'over the edge'...losing control can be a scary thing. If you trust your partner, maybe you can set up a situation where you ask him to continue stimulating you even if you try to pull away...give yourself a safeword in case you really feel in danger, but try to hold off as long as you can. I think once it happens for you, it will get less anxiety inducing.
posted by softlord at 6:30 PM on November 16, 2007

I'm a guy, but I think step 1 is to go slower. It kind of sounds like hes pawing at you and coming too quick.
posted by rhizome at 6:30 PM on November 16, 2007

Yeah, tell him to go slower and move around a little more. Could that help?
posted by schroedinger at 6:39 PM on November 16, 2007

Need more info, anonymous. :) Can you do it on your own? Your question seems to imply that it's too intense no matter who is in charge of the stimulation, but it's not explicitly stated. (Or maybe it is, when you said you've only managed once, but it just sounded like you were talking about being with a partner. I'm probably wrong; never mind.)

Anyway, offhand it sounds like you're being overly-stimulated. Too much pressure, too fast, etc. But I'd imagine that this is something you'd have figured out on your own if you had taken matters into your own hands. So, 1) if you haven't even tried taking matters into your own hands, do so. Figure out if you can find a level of stimulation that does it for you, and then teach your guy how to do it.

2) If you can't handle your own stimulation either, then I'd personally tend to think it's a mental thing. For me, much of the excitement goes on in my head. For example: I can be sitting here minding my own business, not turned on at all, and then make the decision to either a) think about sex, or b) start stimulating myself manually. Guess which one is going to get me hotter? Choice a. Choice b will probably just feel annoying, or forced, and if I continue it may result in that over-stimulated feeling. Like, the blood is going in the right direction and the nerve endings are responding to something, but I'm just not into it so while the correct feelings are probably there, they just aren't registering properly.

Similarly, I can be in bed with a guy and he/we can be doing everything right, but if I'm not properly mentally motivated, it just isn't going to happen. When I find that happening I go to a happy place that always does the trick (that is, I have standby fantasies). Could some relaxing fantasy help you at all?
posted by iguanapolitico at 6:51 PM on November 16, 2007

See if your partner can bring you to orgasm during foreplay, before the penetrative sex. It's easier to relax when you're the one being catered to. Have him take his time, starting with gentle caresses and kisses, and slowly building to more stimulation. Just let your own feelings build slowly and be in the moment, and don't sabotage yourself by worrying that you'll need to pull away. An analogy: Just tell yourself that the senstatons are like little waves washing over you, and learn to anticipate that they will increase in frequency and force, but instead of feeling like you're drowning in them, let yourself feel completely invigorated.
posted by amyms at 6:52 PM on November 16, 2007

I was in a similar boat a couple of years ago. What eventually helped me was a lot of somewhat prolonged (sometimes close to 20 minutes) attention to other hot button areas before moving further south. Preheating the oven, let's say...

Also moving from indirect to more direct touching and back helped me. Too much too close was usually my issue. As always, YMMV.
posted by heavenstobetsy at 6:53 PM on November 16, 2007

I have only managed to orgasm once and it required a lot of concentration, a vibrator, and a position that kept me from pulling back.

If you can't even bring yourself to orgasm regularly, how do you expect someone else to do it? Get to know yourself first - see what feels right, and how to go about getting to an orgasm. Once you have a handle on that, you can help guide your partner down that path.
posted by chrisamiller at 6:56 PM on November 16, 2007

I used to have this problem in my 20's, and here is what I recommend pretty much in order:

1. Slow down (as noted earlier).
2. Oral sex. Tell him what you like.
3. Get on top. Do what feels good to you.
4. Try masturbating in the bath. Luscious, impossible to stay tense, might help you train yourself to relax in other situations.
5. Get a better vibrator.

Best of luck!
posted by pammo at 7:07 PM on November 16, 2007

i also had this problem in my early 20's. i used to find that too much direct stimulation was bad. slowing down helped, and also being okay with the idea that maybe i wouldn't orgasm that time.

also, honestly, i think there was a learning curve involved, in learning what worked to get to that orgasm. i certainly know a lot more about what works for me now than i did then. :-)
posted by rmd1023 at 7:55 PM on November 16, 2007

this is not a good permanent solution, but i'm a fan of a couple glasses of wine. it keeps me from overthinking things.
posted by thinkingwoman at 8:09 PM on November 16, 2007

This may be obvious but it took me a while to figure out at first...some (many?) women find it too intense to have the clitoris touched directly; try coming at it from the side with a layer of skin in between it and the hand/tongue/whatever, if you're not doing so already. And what everyone else said about slowing down and figuring it out yourself first.
posted by frobozz at 8:30 PM on November 16, 2007

On preview, maybe this is TMI, and maybe it's sort of graphic, but I wish that I'd learned it sooner in life.

I'm not sure what it means when you say that everything feels too intense. If you just feel sore, slow it down and add some more foreplay.

If, on the other hand, things just seem "too intense " in a non-painful sense, maybe I can help. If "too intense" means that your eyes are rolling to the back of your head and you're starting to hyperventilate, or just feel overwhelmed, the trick is to take a deep breath and let everything you're feeling just go. Take a deep, deep breath and release everything you're feeling and thinking with that breath. Every time you think that you're coming close to orgasm, just take a deep breath and let it go. Let go of all your physical tension, and worrying about whether you're going to have an orgasm or not. Deep breath, and let it go.

Don't worry that you're going to interrupt the momentum by letting go. You won't. Let it build, and when you feel like you can't take any more, take a deep breath and let it go. Every time it seems like too much, take another deep breath and let it go. Every time you feel like you're peaking, even if you feel like you're peaking, take a deep breath and let it go. Keep taking deep breaths and letting them go, even when you think that you can't bear it any longer. Just let it go. Once you stop worrying about it, it will happen.
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 10:40 PM on November 16, 2007 [2 favorites]

<molybdenum's wife>In addition to the good advice above, (try not to "overstimulate" to the point where it doesn't feel good, but instead take it slower), let me make one other suggestion. Try to rhythmically internally tighten your vaginal muscles when you're excited to help "jump start" the orgasm. After a few times, it should happen automatically. I think the situation you're describing is more common than you think.</molybdenum's wife>
posted by molybdenum at 12:37 AM on November 17, 2007

It will be much easier for you to become orgasmic on your own first and then to teach your partner how to help you.

Try different styles of vibrator. Some are made for insertion and others for external stimulation. Try both. The main feature you need to look for is a control that lets you dial up or down the intensity of the vibrations. You want this control to be separated by a wire from the vibrating part of the unit, so you can easily use it. You also want to use lots of lube with your vibrator (or with your fingers, for that matter). If you aren't sure if you have enough, use more. It should be effortless for you to slide it around if one spot gets a little too intense. There are waterproof vibes that you can use in the bath. There are so many different styles of vibrator that one of them will be perfect for you.
posted by happyturtle at 2:22 AM on November 17, 2007

Concentrating on your own state can be completely counterproductive. Some women, in concentrating harder on finding their own pleasure, seem to forget how nice it is for their partner, too. I don't know of any man who doesn't greatly enjoy a woman coming all over him, so perhaps it would help if, at the crucial moment, instead of thinking to yourself "I'm getting close! Closer! Closer! Uh-oh! Too much! Too close!! Awww..." you could, instead think, "Boy, I'm gonna rawk this! Soon! Get ready! Oh boy! You probably haven't been this good a boy, lately!!! Right THERE! RIGHT NOW!!!! Whoo-hoo!!!!"

Concentrating too hard on having orgasms can kind of stop the body from getting on with the process; hence my suggestion to refocus on your partner as you get near the magic moment, and let your body go on automatic pilot. To do that, it helps some women to remember that nothing in life is quite as nice for a man as getting right to the edge of orgasm, and having a woman you love pull you over the top, by letting herself be her amazing self, at just the right moment.
posted by paulsc at 3:40 AM on November 17, 2007

I used to suffer from something similar, now im at uni and have alot of free time and good vibrators I have worked my way straight through it.
The thing that worked for me was literally kicking my heals in, gritting my teeth and kicking the vibe up another notch, suprisingly enough. I mean its kind of weird at first and you may find you have an extremely powerful orgasm (I've squirted after doing this) but...its worth it.

I totally second paulsc too, and wonder if this is something you need to work on (like me) in your own time before trying it with an audience.

Im 22 if that helps.
posted by Neonshock at 3:48 AM on November 17, 2007

From personal experience, I highly recommend Lonnie Barbach's book, "For Yourself: the Fulfillment of Female Sexuality."
posted by Carol Anne at 5:51 AM on November 17, 2007

Adding lubrication may help with the too intense feeling.
posted by theora55 at 8:36 AM on November 17, 2007

I think you should start with working on achieving orgasm on your own first so you know what to tell him for you to get there.

There could be many factors, and considering your age, while your hormones are telling you that you're excited and looking forward to having sex with your partner, it could also mean that you want to be with your partner(please him, have the physical touch, etc). While orgasm isn't always the goal, when you say intense, it's about you not being in control yourself...imho.

Try to follow your instincts and feelings and sensations when you're by yourself to try to get there. Hope that helps.
posted by icollectpurses at 9:12 AM on November 17, 2007

when it gets too intense, try to make yourself relax into it.
it will feel weird and borderline unpleasant, but just try it. it might not work, but it's worth a try.

alternately, maybe you just like it really gentle. try this during foreplay:
have him use his hand, but ask him to do downward strokes on your clit only, with a lubed finger. on the way down, he can use some pressure but he should know it's friction that feels good, not pressure, so he should be trying to make his finger "travel", not "press". ideally, with each stroke.
the entire length of his finger (palm side), should slide gently down your clit.

but on the way up, he should raise his finger and not touch anything for the first 30 strokes or so- downwards only. (by the way, any men who are reading this, the female urethra is right below the clit, and in general, poking or entering the urethra with tongue or finger is uncomfortable. most clits like to be moved sideways or downward, but upwards is usually unpleasant and too urethra-y to feel nice).

after about 30 strokes of down only, he can make *light* contact on the way up but only just barely grazing your clit- on the way up, there should not be enough pressure/contact to make your clit move *at all* on the way up. some pressure/clit movement on the way down is ok.

during all this, you should hold his wrist and thrust your pelvis into his hand as he does it to guide the speed/pressure he uses.

during all sexual activities, try to use your breathing to increase the sensation- inhale slightly more air than you exhale, so you gradually "top-up" your lungs over a period of 5-10 minutes as things get more intense. when you reach the point of orgasm, your lungs will be overfull. inhale even more, then hold your breath as you come. at the peak of th orgasm, finally allowing the much-waited-for exhalation makes it more intense.

something most men don't know- during clitoral stimulation, if she gasps or inhales sharply, it means you're going too hard. she might enjoy that sometimes, but it probably won't make her come. while you're down there, keep listening for exhales and moans, which mean things are good. when she goes "oh god" in a soft, singsong tone, that's great. but inward gasps mean "ouch".

read the vice guide to eating pussy.
sorry about the gratuitous NSFW pic in that link, but the advice is great.
posted by twistofrhyme at 12:52 PM on November 17, 2007

reply form someone who would prefer to remain anonymous:
After a lifetime of happy, easy, and extremely frequent masturbation, boy, was I surprised to find I had this problem. Direct clit stimulation is just way too much for me, even (maybe especially) if the touch is light -- "too intense" and "too sensitive" are exactly what I say, and it's not enjoyable at all.

I'd never paid that much attention to what I do when I masturbate, but once I started thinking about it, I realized that although I was rubbing hard and fast, I was focusing above the clit, and (near the end) the clit through the hood.

In my experience, guys have a really hard time understanding this; the more experience they have, the worse. "How can it be too intense? Just hold still and take it, it means you're going to come." No, I know what it feels like when I'm going to come, and "unhappy and in pain" does not feature in that description.

If I were you, I'd work on two things right now.

First, be able to masturbate on your own. Find out what works for you -- for me it's really firm, but indirect, pressure. The bottom line is, before you can expect a partner to make you come, you need to be able to make yourself come, on your own. Give clitoral vibes a try, but no matter what society says, don't think they're an automatic ticket to orgasm; for me, they might feel fairly pleasant, but they certainly don't get me anywhere.

Second, once you know how you can orgasm, try to show/teach your partner. This stage will probably take even longer, because apparently it's really hard for guys to understand (to be fair, they haven't had as much hands-on experience with this kind of clit). Even if they're trying, things may not work the way you want them to -- I doubt I'll ever be able to come from oral, but after months, my partner's just starting to get the hang of it with his hands. At this stage, you obviously can't be too shy to masturbate in front of him (especially if he's involved, at whatever level you're comfortable with: thrusting with a dildo, playing with your labia, nibbling your nipples, kissing your lips).

I guess instead of those steps, you could try to do what my partners always seem to suggest -- tie me up, hold me down, or otherwise immobilize me, then go to town when I'm incapable of stopping them. To me this does not sound like happy fun time (the tying up sounds fine, just not so I can be stimulated in a way I dislike), so I haven't let anyone try it yet, but maybe you think it'd work for you.

For now, what you can also do is try on your own to locate other hot spots. Can you have a G-spot orgasm? Mine won't make me come . . . but brush against my deep spot and I'll be writhing and yelling within seconds. It goes a long way towards countering my partner's frustration at not being able to make me come.
posted by jessamyn at 9:14 PM on November 18, 2007

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The first time i fucked a milf

mastrubation blurg 2018-08-27

im on top and she tells me she wants top so i was ok and she gets on top jumping up and down her tits where bouncing i grabbed her ass and started to spank her going up and down she started to cum all over my cock after that she pulls me and sucks me i bent her over and put it in her from behind i started to fuck her and she cums another 2 times then i got to the point of cumming and said "Of fuck yeah baby im going to cum" then i pulled out she sucked me then i came all over her face tits and in her mouth she said that she hadnt seen such a big load i smiled as she swolled the rest of the cm that was in her mouth we fucked for atleast 3 hours before we parted on new years.

My First Time ....so wet

mastrubation virginblood1 2018-08-15

trying to find his head while I felt dizzy and light headed reaching out to pull his head close to my pussy but he was already sliding up my body to give me his cock. While he fucked me I asked him why he waited so long he groaned and could barely speak as he banged and fucked me hard he slowed down and told me that once him and I had sex I would look at him different and want to have sex a lot. One time I told Doug I wanted him to lick my pussy at the same time fuck me hard. I said laying in bed horny I told him I wanted to have my tits sucked at the same time also.

First affair

mastrubation 2018-08-13

I had been planning this trip for months and as I got closer to the date of departure, my companions were dropping like flies (one failed to get the time off work, the other sprained his knee three days before we were to leave). Stacy looked pretty sad and said that I owed her vacation time and that this would help her a lot to gain some experience to further her career. Stacy walked over to the picnic table, sat of the surface, spread her legs and started to rub her clit and slowly work her finger into her pussy. I was getting very close to cumming when she held her fingers in front of my face and said that I should taste.

The new selling job part 13

mastrubation ab8715 2018-08-12

Eric, Phillip and Jason followed Daniel into the locker room. As Jason's cock grew rock hard, Daniel pressed his lips over the head, past leaning forward rubbed it along Daniel's face as Jason's cock slid in and Eric pushed harder, leaned against Jason's side and f***ed his cock into The two guys who fucked Daniels mouth at the same time had hot bodies that fucked Daniel's mouth. "What the fuck man," Eric shouted trying to pull Phillip back to find his Eric pushed his cock between the two guys hips, trying to fight back in. and fucked the warm face-cunt even harder and Daniel took it, took them throat, as Daniel swallowed the last of Eric's cum.

The maid's knickers - part five.

mastrubation bobsmart 2018-08-12

And now the postcard for the new "helper" was on display in the local sari-sari store, I eagerly awaited the arrival of any applicants at our door: with me able to carry out the interviews in the absence of my parents who'd probably be at work when the girls called. As soon as the phone was down, I could feel my cock stirring, and I recall she rang the door bell at about two o'clock and all I could think about was that I had just three hours to get her knickers off. But also made me slightly nervous, as I still lacked confidence and thought that she probably had a lot of experience and high standards in bed - learned by being fucked long and hard and often by those athletic guys down at the court.

Working In Old Men Institution

mastrubation 2018-08-11

'Now now Jonesey dear', said Sara very motherly, and she reached forward taking his massive member lovenly in her hand, and slowly jerked him up and down, whispering into his ear, 'You like to fuck this little babe, shes virginal you know', at which she looked up at me with a broad smile on her lips and a naughty wink in her eye. In reality I was part of the whole goings-on, I was wetting myself watching Sara blow this huge cock, and surrendering to the assault on my vagina, he was masturbating me and all I could do was hold the back of his balding greyed head, keeping him in place as his hot breath was swirling across and between my vaginal lips, and adjusting my postion so give easier access to my swollen vagina, which he was currently burried deep, tickling my bud entrance to my womb.

nailed the nice niece

mastrubation rodma 2018-07-31

The party was in full swing but no Emma I went to look for her I heard moans comming from her mothers bedroom I walked in to see Emma on the bed with her mothers vibrator sliding in and out of her sweet pussy, she told me to shut the door and watch, I watched in awe as my cock was rock hard, I unzipped and rubbed my cock slowly, she groaned and said she was cumming and pushed her hips up and then collapsed my cock twitched and a thick stream of cum poured from my cock.

A Cuckold Coming

mastrubation DickLover59 2018-07-31

"Oh, FUCK yes!" I said as I focused on that huge black cock head pushing open the meaty pink lips of the white woman's juicy-looking pussy. So, as my wife lay sl**ping in our darkened bedroom, I sat forward on the edge of my chair, and as I continued to watch porn, and as I focused on the sight of an enormous black cock ramming it's way deep inside of a white pussy, and then, after only a few more seconds, I, too (finally!!) came; and when I did, it was an amazingly huge load; which excited and pleased me as I watched it spurting out, in strong, thick globs of whitish sperm!

Caught jacking off my shemale cock!

mastrubation cumsquirter 2018-07-27

Nothing like lying in bed, naked, legs spread, lubing up your cock, my shemale cock is 7 inches with a big mushroom head, and start jacking off to porn or mags or fantasies, and you think no one will catch you. I took off my clothes and wet panties, and started to jack my cock off to a porn mag i had with me. then she undressed and put her mouth on my cock, sucking it so good, i did not say a word, then i began to eat her wet pussy, it was dripping with juice! I jackoff to her sometimes, so when you jack that cock or pussy off, lock the door!

Sex Slave To The Neighbours Part 4

mastrubation smallfurrycreature 2018-07-24

Look carefully at me on the screen and you can see how much fuck juice my husband pumped into my pussy after you left, last time." I hesitated for a moment but then her TV voice became stern, commanding " I told you to go to the corner and put your cock in my husband's mouth. He put my cock deeply into his mouth and sucked fora moment and then her voice came back on the TV. If you lie on the couch, you can both watch me get filled with cum while you suck each other's cocks." He stood up and stroked his cock slowly and patiently watching his wife, on the TV, spread her collected cum over the bellies and penises of the men she'd fucked.

Gotta use what you've got...

mastrubation fmac 2018-07-22

‘You know I love to fuck you....I’m always happy to do it.But if you think I’m going in there after you’ve been round to visit that dirty cunt John then you are much mistaken.’ Her cunt must obviously be more sensitive than a baby’s head because she was arching her back and bucking with every stroke.An orgasm hit her out of the blue and she screamed a small scream.Had she been masturbating she would have stopped for a wee while to recover but he carried on fucking her with the brush and she got wetter and wetter and redder and redder as the bristles dragged her lips back and forth and gave a thousand tiny hits to her clit on the way both in and out.

The Writer Likes to Be Watched

mastrubation burgeoning_awakening 2018-07-22

Ever so lightly, she dragged her finger along her clitoris, spread bare by her wide open legs. Back and forth, she imagined, picturing a man sliding his hand back and forth on his throbbing hard cock and watching her intently, his eyes trailing her moving hands and studying her every motion. She let herself fall deep into the image of him spurting arcs of cum as he ejaculated all over her breasts, neck and face, and then magically inside of her, again and again. Her whole body rocking back and forth, she thrust her fingers deep inside and moved strong against the palm of her hand. A shivering, warm rumbling spread through her clit and came into her like a wave as her fingers steadily penetrated her.

Helping a friend True Story

mastrubation funbicouple2015 2018-07-14

There was a girl sitting Indian style on the grass next to the car, calmly smoking a joint, right next to a flat tire. Then I looked her directly in the eyes as I pulled the spare tire from her trunk and told her "I'd love to fuck a beautiful stranger outside, right on the side of the road, where anybody might see" I unzipped my shorts, lowered them until my bulging cock popped out, and told her "don't stop until I'm so hard it scares you". That's when I pulled out, spun her around, pushed inside her as I lifted her off the ground, as she wrapped her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck.

Absence makes the cock go harder

mastrubation neilmc123 2018-07-12

She said that she would use Websites or dating sites and that she would only have safe sex one night stands and never in our marital bed, As a solution this was almost agreeable but I still didn’t like the idea of anyone else being inside my wife, but the thought of me being inside other women was most appealing. He continued taking photos telling me I looked a filthy married slut sucking some strangers cock. He pushed his finger deep in my ass then he pulled his cock out of my pussy and f***ed the tip into my asshole. He then demanded I push the black cock deep inside my pussy while I got double penetrated.

A Bicycle Ride for three horny men

mastrubation 2018-07-08

I was dared to cycle with just the cheesecloth dress on, which I accepted, so I handed him my bikini and off he sped, leaving me in a state of undress, as one could clearly see I was nude under it, having said that, I was excited at the thoughts it generated. As I cycled I could clearly see my breasts and nipples through my unbuttoned front, they swayed, even in their firmness, and it sexually excited me, I was positive a damp patch would be where I was sitting on the seat, but I never gave any thought of concern as I was in a state of sexual arousal.

The Romance of Lust - A classic Victorian erotic n

mastrubation Hangdog90 2018-07-06

The voyage lasted six weeks, and during all that time she had every man in the ship into her every day, and from fair front-fucking had eventually satisfied them in both apertures, and often had had one in each orifice, and sucked a third to spending point, which she deliciously swallowed; she had even taken the premisses of the little twelve-year-old cabin boy, and she declared that she never enjoyed so complete a satisfaction of her excessive lascivious lust as in that happy voyage of six weeks' duration.

Sordid Liaison With the Minging Slut

mastrubation Kinky_Mushroom 2018-07-05

I build their little egos up with false attention and insincere flattery then, like a bored infant knocking over building blocks, I pull out the rug and watch them tumble to the ground savouring every last drop of their anguish – I am a cunt. It is at this point that I want to slap her misshapen face hard but I resist the urge, instead I thrust my fingers into her soaking and smelly unwashed cunt. I close the computer down and then walk up town to go shopping – a sad and perverted middle aged man in a downbeat little town extracting all the depravity he can whilst his life, money and health run out like the grains of sand in an hourglass…

My girls thong Reveals huge lust secret

mastrubation CandidShotz 2018-06-30

When we first had sex I noticed that her pussy was a little too much for me , i def noticedthat I'm not pleasing her how I pleased my other girlfriends bc I was their first. I started looking up interracial porn on the Internet and I was aroused on how much big booty white girls love black guys. Months past things are great, my lust for having a big dick fuck my girl increased. Idk if she is messing around with other guys but I sensed a little mystery with her breath and her dick sucking abilities that literally improved every time we had sex. But I have a feeling that it's not true, I personally think she's a little dirty freak that fucks black guys on the side.

The Ride of My Life

mastrubation 2018-06-27

I bit my lip and asked her, “can I ride you.” Nicky grinned even wider and said “yeah baby, get on.” I straddled her and slide down the cock, I was facing away from her so she started rubbing my butt as I slide up and down the pole. Once I had it in all the way I just started grinding and rubbing my clit, I could feel every inch of it and as I got close to cumming again, I started sliding up and down on top of Nicky and grabbed me at my waste and started bucking her hips up into me, I was feeling the full stroke on my clit again and my legs were shaking from the sensation.


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The Bodies of McMansion Culture

Everyone is beautiful and no one is horny is one of those great internet reads.

The gist:

  1. Gratuitous violence fills our screens while Hollywood grows ever more prudish.
  2. Normal sex by regular people with realistic bodies in happy relationships just doesn’t happen on screen anymore.
  3. There’s a curious connection between the functionally useless McMansion (and the linked McMansion Hell had me literally laughing out loud) and ’roided up bodies that are unhealthy and equally useless.
  4. Porn is the only place for sexuality and nudity in American culture.

This is all rather curious and deeply unhealthy.


It Only Happens When I Dance With You

It Only Happens When I Dance With You It Only Happens When I Dance With You

Status: Finished

Genre: Romance

Status: Finished

Genre: Romance

Submitted: March 25, 2016

A A A | A A A

Submitted: March 25, 2016

Gene looked at the clock and noticed it was going on midnight. He took a long drag from his cigarette and leaned back in his swivel chair, covering his eyes. He had been in his study going over the script for The Three Musketeers that he had been given earlier that day. Suddenly, the sound of a soft piano melody flowed through the room. He opened his eyes and looked towards the door as if to get a better listen. He closed his portfolio and stubbed out his cigarette. Quietly, he slipped into the den and his lips curled into a smile as he admired the sight of Judy sitting at the piano wearing nothing but one of his t-shirts playing and softly humming

Gene found it unbearably sexy when she wore his t-shirts and that accompanied by the sensual sound of her hums began to wake an excitement in him. He cleared his throat to signal he was behind her and she turned around on the bench, smiling.

“Well, look who decided to come out of his cave.” She teased.

Gene walked up behind her and rested his hands on her shoulders. He bent down to kiss her neck.

“You sound wonderful. What is that?”

Judy cradled his face between her shoulder and jaw as he placed another tantalizing kiss on her neck.

“Irving gave it to me today… He wanted me to take it home and try it out. He wrote it for us to do together in Easter Parade.”

Gene focused in on the title and read it aloud.

It Only Happens When I Dance With You…

She nudged forward on the bench and Gene slipped behind her so that she was sitting with her back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder.

“Keep playing…” He whispered quietly.

Judy smiled and nodded as she picked up where she left off. Just then, Gene’s hands began to wander. He found the hem of her t-shirt and he slid his hands underneath, resting his palms on her bare tummy. He tilted his head on her shoulder and darted his tongue gently against the soft skin on the side of her neck. Judy closed her eyes and her keystrokes became weak as she lost herself in the feel of Gene’s warm breath and tongue against her.

“Baby… Don’t stop.” He whispered again.

“I can’t focus when you kiss me like that.”

“What? Like this?” Gene pulled one hand out from under her shirt and cradled her chin, turning it towards him. He parted his lips against hers and sensually slipped his tongue inside, finding hers and teasing it. Judy’s bottom lip quivered against his and she moaned quietly. Gene pulled back, lowering his brow and smiling seductively.

“Y-yes, like that…” She replied, trembling.

“Oh, that’s nothing. Come on, keep going.”

Judy reluctantly turned back towards the piano and began again. Gene returned his hand underneath her shirt and his finger tips began tracing a path upwards.

Two cheeks together can be so divine,
But only when those cheeks are yours and mine…”
He sang in a husky voice along with her melody.

Gene’s fingers reached her breasts and he rolled the peak between his thumb and index finger, making Judy fumble once again.

“Baby… I want to hear the whole song.” He whined.

Judy took a deep breath in and continued playing. Suddenly, Gene ceased teasing her breasts and his fingers began the opposite journey back down her tummy. This time, finding the waist of her panties. He slid the tips in up to his first knuckle and slowly tickled the top of her pubic bone, sending a wave of arousal through her body. Her fingers continued traveling over the keys but the sound of her voice became laboured as her breathing deepened.

Gene took her earlobe between his lips and began gently sucking at it as his fingers slid further down in her panties, discovering what his teasing had done to her. He smiled and began tracing his middle finger over her, applying more and more pressure with each stroke until her humming turned into moans.

“Gene…” She breathed, opening her legs a little wider for him.

“Last bar, baby… Come on.” He murmured against her ear.

That only happens with you…” He sung for her.

“Now that wasn’t so hard, was it?” He teased.

Judy turned around and shot him a playfully angry look. Gene laughed and wiped her scowl away with another delicious kiss. He got up from the bench and offered her his hand. She took it and he helped her to her feet. He hooked his fingers into the hem of her shirt and pulled it up over her head, exposing her bare torso to him. His hands travelled down her back and he lifted her up on to the cool wood of the piano lid. She leaned back and Gene placed two more delicious kisses against her skin, this time on her chest.

He slid her panties slowly off of her. Leaning down, he lifted her thighs onto his shoulders and immediately took her into his mouth. Judy tossed her head back in ecstasy and softly moaned his name as his licking became more vigourous. She reached behind her and planted her hands over the edge of the piano, gripping it tight as her thighs tried to close against Gene’s head. The warmth of his tongue and gentle sucks almost sent her over the edge. Gene reached his hands up and caressed her lush, brazenly exposed breasts. Judy placed her hands on top of his, keeping them on her chest as she arched her back, releasing her climax. Gene’s mouth filled and his lips curled into a smile against her. He slipped his hands from underneath hers and pulled her up into a sitting position. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her deeply.

“We’re going to have to burn this thing…” She giggled against his mouth and patted the piano.

“Oh, we’re not done yet.” He shot back.

“We’re not?”

Gene lifted her off the piano.

“No. Turn around.”

Judy obeyed and turned around in his hold, leaning her torso over the piano lid. He slid his pants down, releasing his throbbing erection and parted her legs with his knee. He ran his fingers lightly up her spine and gripped her shoulder as he eased himself into her. He filled every inch of her with his desire, making her moan again and again. Judy reached for his hand and squeezed it, hanging on to him before he pulled out.

“I want to see you.” He whispered.

Judy turned back towards him and he lifted her up, once again onto the lid. Staring into her chocolate brown eyes, he eased into her again, this time slower. He ran the back of his fingers down her arm and leaned into her, taking her bottom lip gently into his mouth. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arm around his shoulders, resting her hand against the nape of his neck and twirling his hair in her fingers. He increased his speed and lifted her thighs up towards her chest, helping his strokes become longer and deeper. He could see in her eyes and the flush of her skin that she was nearing another climax and he too was nearing his.

Holding her in his arms, he tightened his grip on her and buried his face in the crook of her neck. He inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of her sweet perfume and their sensuous love making. He felt her tighten around him and he groaned, releasing himself inside her. Judy fell back on the piano and Gene leaned down with her, resting his head on her chest. Her chest was rising and falling heavily as she tried to catch her breath.

“Ok, now we can burn this thing…” He panted.

© Copyright 2017 ohmygarlands. All rights reserved.

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Domestic Bimbo Supplements

What do you want? For me to be an obedient, eager to cook and clean, baby-wanting mistress of yours? PUH-LEASE! I’ll never wear an apron! Or high heels. Or a mini skirt! You want a slut, a baby-having slut! You don’t want a woman with her own mind or a cause to fight for or an opinion! You want me to be at your beck and call, to…

…what? You have what for me? What’s this? An herbal supplement? Is it organic? Is it natural? Oh, all right then. That’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for me. A gift? You’ve never… well, I won’t bother you then. Go back to work, honey.

I’ll leave you alone in your office. What? Oh, I must not have called you “honey.” You know I wouldn’t do that…

Uggh… I’m going to lie down.

Honey! It’s really, really urgent!

It’s more important than that stuff you’re doing with those letters… or words. Are they letters or…

My head kinda hurts…

Ugh! Stop making me think!

I need your opinion on my titties!

Like, my bra strap is showing. Is it slutty, or is it sexy?

I know, you’re my boyfriend. So I have to look respectible, but also, like someone could just fuck me?

‘Cuz then, it makes you look good!

And that’s why I’m here, right? You buy me things so I can make you look good!

From Tara Tainton: Unknowingly Transforming into the Overly Delightful Housewife You Always Wanted

Unquestionably, the best money I ever spent on porn.

“Like… um, what happened?”

I looked at my girlfriend, trying to imitate her confusion, “What do you mean, babe?”

“Well, like, I don’t remember having these.” She placed her hands under her impressive breasts, lifting them slightly.

“What? Nicole, you’ve had those for years. You got them done right after you dropped out of college, remember?” I explained, slowly replacing her memories with my new reality for her.

“I.. uhh, dropped out? I thought I… was smart and stuff?” Already, her mind was betraying her.

He chuckled softly and gave her a hug, “No, silly, you tried really hard but you kept failing. You decided that you should focus on things you were good at, so you got fake boobs and decided to be my dumb, sexy, little trophy wife.”

She cocked her head slightly. My words sending conflicting messages to her brain. She was never smart, was she? How silly of her to think that. A desire to be sexy and pleasing to me burned within her; it was what she always wanted.

“Ummm, right! I, like, knew that! Sorry, hun, I’m, like, such a dum dum sometimes.” She said, pouting a little.

I kissed her on the forehead, “It’s okay, Nikki; I can think for both of us, okay?”

She nuzzled her head into my shoulder, “Like, totes. You take, like, such good care of me.”


Reviews For Oh, and thanks
Reviewer: Katharine Anonymous Date: 22/10/16 - 05:33 pm Title: Chapter 1

So sweet, and so hot! Love it

Reviewer: Crayon Anonymous Date: 24/01/15 - 04:47 pm Title: Chapter 1

Gah! Very hot thank you sex! Glad I found this little epilogue to the lovely Comfort Food.

Reviewer: evil_dime Anonymous Date: 09/04/13 - 10:44 pm Title: Chapter 1

*lol* Nice! And hot. ^^

Reviewer: aeil Anonymous Date: 24/08/07 - 05:01 pm Title: Chapter 1

Ok first you need to mark this and Comfort Food together as a series because it's evil for anyone who has read and liked that story (i.e. read that story) to not get to read this too. Second - my first reaction to this story was kinda a speechless "Um" this story defines why people invented erotica as a category because it's too well written to be in the same basket as porn and yet - damn it's you're whole body tightens in reaction hot. It's ... it's the fact that Harry can't get a whole sentence out. It starts to get hot at "Table, over" and then ... you're just good ok.

Author's Response: Oh, you're totally right about marking it as a series. Apologies, I will get right on that. Thank you so. I'm always sort of "ish" about my sex scenes, so it's brill to hear that other people are decidedly not.

Reviewer: Shaggy Anonymous Date: 30/04/07 - 05:36 pm Title: Chapter 1

Aw, thank you darling! It's good to see more of these boys. *

Author's Response: All for you. Sorry it wasn't a) on time, and b) more.

Skin by egelantier, photo by microbophile


1D & Janoskians Dirty Imagines

Luke Brooks Dirty Imagine

It’s been a while since you and Luke did anything fun, and it was starting to get to you. Luke was usually busy making videos with the boys and rehearsing for the Got Cake Tour. When he wasn’t busy, he was sleeping all day. Nowadays, he didn’t even touch you.

Luke finally decided that today was not one of his “hibernation days” and watched TV since he woke up. He sat on one side of the couch while you were on the other. He didn’t even look at you. You let out a loud sigh to try to catch his attention, but it didn’t seem to work. He just kept staring at the TV.

"Hey, Luke" you asked.

"Yeah…?" he answered while staring down at his phone.

"Do you wanna come to the mall with me?"

"Alright… What about a movie?"

"Lunch? It’s on me…"

"No." This third one syllable word made you so mad.

"THAT’S IT! IT’S BEEN MONTHS SINCE WE DID SOMETHING FUN! IT’S BEEN MONTHS SINCE YOU’VE EVEN HUGGED ME, LET ALONE, KISSED ME. YOU DON’T EVEN LOOK AT ME ANYMORE!" you yelled. Realizing what you just said, you ran off to the bedroom and locked the door behind you. You started sobbing into your pillow when you heard a soft knock on the door.

"Babe…? I know you can hear me. I’m sorry, okay? With all the stuff going on in my life, I just don’t have the energy to do everything. I guess I didn’t realize that I wasn’t spending time with you anymore… Can you open up the door? I want to tell you something, and I can’t tell you it from behind the door."

You got up and unlocked the door. As soon as you opened the door, Luke grabbed you and started passionately kissing you. You heard him lock the door behind him, and you knew what was going to happen next.

Soon he was on the bed and you were on top of him, still kissing each other. When the make out session made its way to tounging, Luke took your shirt and bra off. You unbuttoned your jean shorts and tried to take them off without leaving his side. He unbuckled his jeans and took them off, along with his shirt.

He turned you over and hovered above you for a couple seconds before he pushed his cock inside you. He thrusted into you hard and fast. It only took a couple hard thrusts for you to orgasm.

Once you had your third orgasm, he reached his own and came inside of you.

He laid next you and put his arm around you. He pulled you in for a hug and said, “I’m sorry and I promise I won’t ignore you again. I love you”

posted 2 weeks ago with 7 notes

This song! It’s amazing!

posted 1 year ago with 1 note

Niall Horan Dirty Imagine #1

You and Niall are on a vacation on a Cruise Ship going to Hawaii. You just settled down in your room when Niall sneaks up behind you and hugs your waist tightly. “(Y/N), thank you for giving me love all these years. I have to give something to you.” he said, turning you to face him. “What is it, Nialler?” you asked him. “My last name.” he said, getting on one knee. You gasped as he said, “(Y/N), please make me the happiest man in the world. Will you marry me?” A tear of joy runs down your cheek. You were just about to say ‘Yes’ when you had a better idea. “Hold on a second.” you told him, kissing him on the cheek before you took your suitcase and headed into the bathroom. “(Y/N), are you okay?” he asked following you. “I’m fine. I’ll be out in a minute. You just relax on the bed.” you told him. You heard his footsteps leading away from the door. You opened your suitcase and pulled out the sexiest lingerie you had and put it on. After about a 4 minutes, you were finally ready. You got out of the bathroom and found Niall watching TV. “Hey, baby.” you said in a sexy tone. Niall did a very loud wolf-whistle. You laughed. “Now, we’re going to have sex and your going to like it. It is going to answer the question you asked me earlier. If it’s good, I’ll marry you. But if it stunk, we’ll stay together just as boyfriend and girlfriend. ” you growled at him. “Is it safe to say that you’re giving me a boner?” he asked you. “Yes.” you said walking over to him. He licked his lips. You like it, but you couldn’t tell him. “You’re going to do whatever I say. Got it?” you demanded. He nodded. “Stand up.” was the first command you gave him. He stood up in front of you with a scared look on his face. “Close your eyes.” he didn’t hesitate to do so. He closed his eyes tightly and looked up at the ceiling. “Now, relax and enjoy the feeling.” you told him. You unbuckled his belt and undid his pants, not pulling down the zipper just yet. As you massaged his balls through his pants, he panted very hard. The bulge in his pants got bigger. “You like that, huh?” you asked him rhetorically. You unzipped the zipper and pulled his pants down to his ankles. You licked his balls through his boxers. He let out a very loud moan. You slowly pulled down his boxers to reveal his hard cock. You pulled his boxers to his ankles and began to lick the tip of his penis. He screamed out “(Y/N)!” You stopped licking the top of his cock and stood up. “Take your pants off all the way.” you demanded. He did that, but instead of standing back in place, he practically wrestled you until all of your clothes were off. “We’re going to have sex and you’re going to like it. It will be hot sex and we’ll get married.” he told you. “Got it?” he said in a sexy tone in your ear. You nodded and smiled. He grabbed you by the waist and threw you on the bed. You landed on your side and he forcefully, but not strong enough to hurt you, pushed you down so you were on your back. “Open your legs.” he demanded. You opened your legs very slowly. He squeezed his head between your legs and licked your soaking wet pussy. Eating you out, he took his right hand and stuck one of his fingers inside of you. You let out a small squeal. He giggled and continued to pleasure you. He took his left hand and rubbed your clit while he licked and fingered you. You screamed with joy as he pleasured you. You were about to cum when he took his finger out of you. “Tease.” you told him jokingly. “You know how it feels then.” he said as he lifted you up and got under you. “Get on me.” he demanded. “How bad do you want it?” you asked him, rubbing your clit very hard. His eyes widened. “Bad!” he yelled. “You’re gonna have to prove it.” you told him. “Okay. I will.” he said getting on top of you. He started giving you lovebites all over your body. You couldn’t help but moan every time he moved to a new spot on your body. “Now, how bad do you want it?” he asked you. “Bad!” you yelled. “How bad?” he asked you, sucking on your right boob. He bit down on your nipple and you yelled, “JUST GET IN ME ALREADY!” He laughed and put his very, very hard cock inside of your tight body. You screamed as the pain and pleasure got a hold of you. “Wow, you’re tighter than I imagined.” he admitted. “You imagine how tight I am?” you asked, stopping his hard thrusts. “Yeah.” he said, embarrassed. “Well, who told you to stop?” you asked. He smiled and continued pleasuring you with hard thrusts. He went deeper and deeper with every thrust. You and Niall continued making love until you both got tired and went to bed at 6:00 A.M. You woke up the next morning to find that Niall was awake, quietly watching you sleep. “How long have you been awake?” you asked him. “Two hours. You just look so beautiful when your sleeping.” he told you. You blushed. “So was it good?” he asked you, hoping your answer would turn out good. “It was amazing. And I was going to say yes anyways. I just wanted to have fun.” you told him. He laughed and kissed you. “I love you.” he said. You whispered, “I love you, too, Nialler.” before you both went back to sleep in each others arms.

posted 1 year ago with 30 notes


Hot Wife Experience with Shalina Devine & Step-Daughters

The strangest objects tie you together with your wife, Shalina. You are both cynical and you are both workaholics. You both have a failed marriage behind you and you both have a step-daughter you spoiled rotten. Oh… and maybe it’s worth mentioning that when the mood strikes you, you can both get fetish as hell. Today you have both of your stepdaughters at the house, and as expected they are at each others throats. Will you be able to handle three women at once? Let’s find out! Keywords: POV, hardcore, blowjob, 18+ Teeny, blonde, brunette, anus, older, foursome, doggy, cowgirl, missionary, reverse cowgirl, step-daughter, step-father

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My Family Pies - Tricked Litter Step Sister To Fuck And She Loved It! S2:E1

She was kissing me so fast I didn't even know if she was breathing. Charles reached to activate the shields and plasma guns and received a huge shock, "Damn it. " she said, getting up and motioning me to follow her.

He spent most of the night trying to reach her on her cell, he had left the house around 8 and had car trouble.

My Family Pies - Tricked Litter Step Sister To Fuck And She Loved It! S2:E1

At the same time, Caesar came back into the kitchen. Jericho felt the pressure build up in his cock, he dug his nails into her hips, hearing her squeak and moan in the process. In 4, out 4, in 4, out 4, always leaving one inside her. almost like a rape. Is that really you?" "You KNOW her?" Caesar asked, recovering first.

Her right arm was trapped Mackenzew us but her left arm had moved around and her forearm laid along side my hip; her Mackenee was softly holding my right cheek.

From: Yozshugal(94 videos) Added: 20.06.2018 Views: 106 Duration: 08:59
Category: Music

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Video сomments (19)
Fegami 25.06.2018
I think I could maybe walk that.
Shaktijind 27.06.2018
Juhn 05.07.2018
No. They are NOT the same, and if GOD is an idiot, then you are worse because He is smarter than you.
Goltira 13.07.2018
It's a simple question ..
Nizshura 15.07.2018
Just stop. I swear some days you just need to be contrarian because you think it is a more interesting argument.
Bahn 18.07.2018
Momma Chasing, oh ya forgot that could happen. lol
Vudozragore 21.07.2018
More on the Hyde Amendment; hope this helps:
Mokus 01.08.2018
They have no will nor capability to end it!!!!!!!
Vikinos 07.08.2018
I'm surprised that the folks at CNN can keep a straight face when they insist they are objective.
Daramar 11.08.2018
>>"Through the will of the people, via their elected legislators, they put an amendment on their constitution that marriage in that state shall be between one man and one woman."<<
Groshura 13.08.2018
Nah, mid-terms is local congressional stuff. The majority party always gets banged in the midterms. And not all Bush and McCain voters like Trump. And visa-versa. No what I mean? No telling what the outcome will look like. Some Republicans (Ryan) aren't even bothering to run.
Akinokinos 16.08.2018
Now that is a bit more risky, if he's doing it for her WITHOUT her knowing or asking and it WASN'T causing a problem for him.
Dur 25.08.2018
The question is, how big of a linguistic inventory did pre-Islamic Arabic have? There may certainly have been a defensive cultural chauvinism. However, the Quran was engaging with religious intertexts from other languages. It may be that Muhammad simply didn't have a way to say what he wanted to say in his own language without borrowing heavily from Syriac (or Aramaic in general). We can look at the Syriac-speaking community in Malabar in India to see how far afield Syriac traveled via trade and how much influence it had as a trade language.
Kijora 27.08.2018
So gay couples:
Taugor 31.08.2018
I,m sure they irritated the Romans to action.
Taubei 04.09.2018
That's the only thing we can know about God.
Gardagami 08.09.2018
How should one contextualise Deuteronomy 13:13-15?
Marr 13.09.2018
Nope, scientific theories are non absolute truths; alright? But when it elevates into a scientific law, then it becomes an absolute truth. As in: if a=b and b=c then a=c, that's transposition in Algebra. By substituting real numbers it can be observed that the postulate is true. Got it?
Taur 17.09.2018
Meh you dont have to stalk me??

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European guys frequently fear that Thai women see a supplier inside them. You must observe this at a really differentiated way. The massive majority of Thai girls do not desire a European who puts the world at their feet. They would like to start a family, have kids, and a guy to live with.


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